Another tuneless goon is going to be eliminated from X Factor tomorrow – but who?
Who will the public vote off this week? Will it be Binman, Goatboy, Cry-Machine, The Creepy Twins or one of the other morons? Guessing which X Factor contestant will be eliminated is OK, but betting on the result is much more fun – it actually makes that tedious second bit of the show worth watching.
So who’s going to leave X Factor this week? Here are the X Factor Third Elimination Betting Odds, with a little bit of help from Betfair.com…
Shayne Ward – Shayne wouldn’t get eliminated from X Factor even if
he machine-gunned the entire studio audience tomorrow night. The public
love him because he’s got it all – good looks, a strong voice, a dad
who rapes pensioners. All he has to do is sing a vaguely sad song
somewhere near the end of the show and he’ll breeze through. Current
odds – 399/1
Andy Abraham – Andy isn’t the favourite to win X Factor any more
because – even though he’s a bloody binman – Shayne outdoes him in the
pity stakes. But that’s not to say that he’ll be eliminated tomorrow.
In a sense, it was a mistake to make him sing The Greatest Love Of All
in the first week: it’s so comically bombastic that anything else he
chooses to sing won’t be as good. Another ridiculous power-ballad should see him
safe this week. Current odds – 249/1
Journey South – Are we the only people in the world who don’t like
Journey South? They’ve emerged as X Factor front-runners lately,
winning over people left, right and centre with their horrible denim
jackets and GHD’d hair and stupid fake tans. Journey South have their
own niche market in the competition – nasty overblown soft-rock. We
want them to leave, but that won’t happen tomorrow. It’ll be a different
story in three weeks, but for now Journey South are in the clear.
Current odds – 149/1
Maria Lawson – Do you remember Romeo from So Solid Crew? He sang a
song about gravy once. Anyway, Maria Lawson sang on Romeo’s album. That
probably makes us like her a little bit less, to be honest, but all of
Romeo’s fans will be sure to vote her through. Just kidding – as if
Romeo actually has any fans left – but Maria won’t get eliminated from
X Factor tomorrow. Current odds – 35/1
Nicholas Dorsett – In the first week of X Factor, Nicholas sang a
bland song with a lack of conviction. In the second week, he sang a
randy song and experimented with hip thrusts and come-hither looks.
This week, we’re expecting him to sing I’m Too Sexy by Right Said Fred
dressed in a full-body gimp suit while humping some poultry. Will he be
eliminated? Probably not. Current odds – 26/1
Brenda Edwards – There’s not a lot to say about Brenda. We kind of
like her, but at the same time we think she’d make a lousy winner. She
looks like she’d be more at home singing on the Lottery than CD:UK, and
nobody wants that in a winner. Eventually she’ll be eliminated, and
she’ll do that funny eye thing when she goes, but it probably won’t be
this week. Current odds – 33/2
The Conway Sisters – From here onwards, all the acts have a strong
chance of being eliminated tomorrow. The Conway Sisters are a genuinely
abysmal group. They can’t really sing, they can’t dance, they have the
charisma of a three-week old teabag and they’re not great to look at.
What they do have, however, are Irish accents, and that alone is
keeping them in the competition because everyone in Ireland is
obviously voting for them. Eventually the Irish will be outweighed and
The Conway Sisters will go. And it could be this week. Current odds –
Chico Slimari – Last week, everyone was certain that Chico would be
eliminated. Everyone but us, that is. We kind of enjoy watching him
spamming about the stage shrieking his songs like an electrified
vampire. And people are beginning to see things our way. X Factor would
be a crappier TV show without him, even if he is the new Cheeky Girls.
Current odds – 17/5
Chenai Zinyuku – Of all the comments left on our X Factor pages,
most of them have been in support of Chenai. This means that a) Chenai
is a talented and worthwhile singer or b) Chenai has a big family.
Although Chenai isn’t a bad singer is such, she’s been marked out for
early elimination. And she could go this week. There are more deserving
eliminees this week, but hey, we don’t make the rules. Current odds –
Phillip McGee – Phillip should have been eliminated last week. His
song was so off-key that it made all the windows in our house smash.
And it made our dog’s head explode. And it made a commercial passenger
jet fall out of the sky onto an orphanage. It was that bad. But Phillip
has the Irish vote behind him, so – even though he couldn’t hit a note
with a double decker bus – we’ve got a horrible feeling that he’ll be
safe this week. We hope not, though. Current odds – 33/17
Come Monday, we’ll either be bragging about how clever we are, or
crying into our early morning cocktails because we were so very very
wrong. And on Monday we’ll also reassess the X Factor winning odds. In
the meantime, head over to the UK TV Special Bets section of Betfair.com. You get free stuff when you join up, look…
readers get free bets when they join Betfair.com! Enter the code WEB111
during sign-up for £10 free or WEB222 for £20 free
The hecklerspray Betfair.com Tutorial
[story by Stuart Heritage]
i am not one of chenai’s family im a supporter of hers, yes i should have voted last week but i dont think its fair to say only her family vote for her she is talented and i dont think she deserved to be in the bottom 2 last week. I will be voting this week.
i really hope philip goes this week, damn the irish vote keeping him in!
Your comment about The Conway Sisters was a little harsh – I think the lead singer is charm itself and you obviously have no taste in women.
The rest made me laugh; true, Philip is absolutely dire.
i didnt like the naff coment about the cheeky girls they happen to be verry good actualy
nicholas is buff hes the best and best looking i want him to win
chenai has messed up big style- arguing like a chav with Brenda and Maria cos they’r better thab her and everyone knows it. sad.
I have to say I am sick of hearing about Chenais tough time and how shes doing all this for her brothers. I refuse to give a sympathy vote. You should compete on talent and nothing else. If you vote out of sympathy someone like Steve Brookstein wins and we wouldn’t want that would we!!
I CANT BELIVE CHENAI WENT OUT
SHE WAS THE BOMB
WE ALL LOVE U CHENAI DONT GIVE UP!
HOPE YOU CARRY ON SINGING !!
CYA GOOD LUCK XXX