WWE’s Chyna And A Hulk Hogan Lookalike With A Hard-On

Followers of pro-wrestling are invariably still washing their brains with industrial bleach after seeing the skinny-flick of Chyna and her very large nubbin being taken on in the ring by fellow grappler X-Pac.

Of all the celebrity sex-tapes, it really is up their in the harrowing league with Gene Simmons and Screech Powers.

Not that this is stopping our Chyna. She’s decided to make a career out of nudity and, having appeared in Playboy a couple of times, she’s now making a porno which is based on the Royal Rumble and features a Hulk Hogan lookalike with his lad out, ready for some Spunkamania. And yes, we’ve lost our lunch three times already, just thinking about it.

So, how does the Royal Rumble theme carry out? Well, we’re not happy to tell you that Chyna will be taking on nine men at the same time, all of whom look like famous wrestlers.

There’s the aforementioned Hulk Hogan lookalike, but there’ll also be adult-filmalikes such as a wannabe Triple H and, possibly most disturbing of all, a man who looks like Ric Flair.

If you’ve seen Ric Flair recently, he looks like a pensioner’s tit with two sausages for legs. A-WOO! indeed.

Also in the weird stakes is that Chyna and the real Triple H actually dated each other for a while, which means she’ll be going back to hump an ex, albeit one that looks like him and is willing to penetrate her for money.

We can only hope that there’s a scene in this bongo flick that will provide some kind of light-relief, such as an appearance from a silently masturbating Mean?Gene Okerlund, with a single tear falling onto his microphone as he acts as hype man for each new ‘entrant’.

You’re laughing now and, indeed, will invariably look for this online when it sees release through no more than curiosity… but seriously… this could be the most disturbing thing ever recorded, worse than watching an executions snuff video.


And if you’re wondering what the Ultimate Warrior thinks about all of this, then look no further than this video.


  1. Cookie Monster says

    “this could be the most disturbing thing ever recorded”. The sequel will be a lesbian affair featuring the impersonator Maggie “Iron Dong” Thatcher and the dude who played Mini Me (sporting scuba gear, naturally; safety first, after-all). It’s loosely based on a dramatic political novel and has the working title “Fist Among Equals”. I daresay that it should prove a better viewing than Shaving Ryan’s Privates.

    Oh, c’mon, who doesn’t love spoof porn titles? Am I wrong? Eh?