At time of writing, hecklerspray is unable to confirm or deny that popstrel Lily Allen successfully made herself something to eat last night, but indications are not hopeful according to her twitter feed.
The ?voice of summer 2006? has last night thrown the public into turmoil.
Not by ?so closely resembling her Dad that you can't decide whether or not you could smash her without thinking of ?him? and laughing about that Tourettes doc he did which would, like, probably put her off and that?, but with an astonishing dining problem.
Fears began when she desperately tweeted:
?It would take me 30mins just to get all these ingredients out of the fridge?
Referring to her forlorn attempts to feed herself.
The tweet also contained the ominous hashtag #jamieoliverlies. hecklerspray does not endorse the opinion that Jamie Oliver is a liar. Or a self-involved neglectful husband, average cook, publicity hound and tubby lisping imbecile. We endorse none of these.
Eschewing the ?Bullshit Frittata? recipe she probably found in the fat-tongued idiot-book of recipes, she begged of the social-networking ?site? or whatever it's called:
?What temperature should one bake a potato at ? And for how long ??
To date no-one is in a position to confirm that any answers were received along the lines of ?really hot. And for ages?, but indications are that her ongoing commitment to a baked potato are strong.
Allen?s final anguished tweet regarding her dinner was:
?Is it important to wrap it in foil??
As of now, sources are unsure about the success or otherwise of the ?Lily Allen Baked Potato? pairing. Rumours of a secret encounter with a Birdseye Potato Waffle are being denied, with a source stating that any third-parties are not involved, despite ?all the stuff with the foil. If that's what it takes, Lily?s happy to do it.?
We made the last bit up.
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Tom J says
Twitter has advanced our humble lives so much. Today it has shown us the crippling confusion that comes with massive mental retardation and asks the harrowing question “what would YOU do if you were so stupid you couldn’t even bake a potato”? These are tough questions with even tougher answers, unless you answered “pizza” in which case shut up, you’re completely missing the point here.
@EssBen says
I’d probably hang out the back of it, as long as it didn’t try to engage me in conversation, or look at me.