Tom Cruise: “I Love Katie Holmes, Honest”

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes continue to rumble around the world, proclaiming their love for each other ten million times a second, as if they’re trying to convince everyone that their love is honest.

At the Berlin premiere of Tom’s latest blockbuster War Of The Worlds, Tom took time to tell everybody that he loves Katie Holmes and the whole shebang wasn’t a big stunt.

Even though 60% of Americans are said to be under the impression that this whole Cruise/Holmes love thing is a whopping great publicity stunt, Tom and Katie keep strenuously denying it.

If it’s not Tom (DVDs) leaping onto Oprah’s sofa and wigging out
like an electrocuted boy, it’s Katie (DVDs) repeating how wonderful Tom is,
like a shaky-headed dead-eyed automaton. And if it’s not Tom freaking
out his studio by acting so strangely, it’s Katie signing up
wholeheartedly to Scientology.

And in Berlin, Tom Cruise was asked if his two month love affair with young Katie was a publicity stunt. He replied "That’s just ridiculous. I’m head over heels in love." Let’s face it, though. He was never going to say "Alright, it’s a fair cop. I don’t even like her," was he.

To reinforce his message, Cruise added "Something magnificent has happened to me and something extraordinary, and I’m so happy I just can’t restrain myself," during his now-traditionally lengthy fingersnappin’, "No, you’re the man!" premiere meet and greet with his fans.

People believe the Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes relationship so little that there’s now even a website, freekatie.net, dedicated to prising the young starlet out of the clutches of her older beau.

But let’s assume that it will never work. Meanwhile, the two
unstoppable forces of Cruise and Holmes will collide with the immovable
object that is the London premiere of War Of The Worlds on Sunday.

Expect an explosion of meaningless tommyrot of an unprecedented magnitude on the red carpet.

Related stories:

Katie Holmes Submits To Scientology

War Of The Worlds: "Fear My Scary Aliens" - Spielberg

[story by Stuart Heritage]