Justin Bieber is not only turning into a megabrat, throwing lewd hand gestures at people as well as shunning his mental fans, but he’s also turning into a massive slag, willing to put his name to absolutely anything that will earn him a dollar.
You can buy the Bieber doll, some sparkly nail polish, the Bieber training bra and, now, one of the most surreal products ever released.
That’s right folks, if you look at your teeth and gums and resent them for not being tuneful enough, Bieber is here to help with a range of singing toothbrushes.
You read that correctly. The world’s most famous unfertilised egg wants you to stick a bit of plastic in your mouth that sings his two biggest hits, using your skull as an amplifier.
Chilling.
One toothbrush will play Baby or U Smile directly into your vibrating eye-sockets while the other will transmit Somebody To Love and Love Me directly into your milk teeth.
But these won’t be 30 second loops. You wish. Each track lasts two minutes, which is designed to encourage youngsters to brush for the recommended length of time per teeth scraping session.
And don’t think this is just for pinhead kids. There’s also Bieber related oral hygiene products being made for adults. That’s right. There are adults out there who like Justin Bieber.
If you know anyone interested in such a product, it is advised that you pull their teeth out with pliers at the earliest opportunity.
We’ll just have to wait and see if Bieber gets a subliminal ‘abortion is bad’ message in these products.
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Cookie Monster says
This is genius. Surely there are millions of fans who can’t wait to put a little bit o’ Bieber in there gaping, drooling maws. It is also a perfect anti-abortion message; better on the gums than… okay, connect the dots yourself.