This weekend it emerged that a 10-tonne satellite the size of a bus will smash into Earth at 22,000mph in the next couple of weeks – leaking all sorts of hazardous substances – and nobody knows where it'll hit, putting millions at risk.

In other news, some actors think that Daniel Day-Lewis is quite good at acting.

The SAG awards took place last night, and because it's just about the only awards show where nobody will get booed by the people who write Smallville just for attending, almost every single actor in the world turned up. And by now you'll already be able to guess who won.

The writers' strike has made a right old arsepickle out of awards season this year, and for that we'll be eternally grateful. Because the Screen Actors Guild – the SAG, if you will – officially supports the WGA (Writers Guild Of America. Do keep up), it has banned its members from turning up to anything that the WGA wrinkles its nose at. So the Golden Globes turned into the world's dullest press conference, the People's Choice Awards turned into a retrospective clips show about Drew Barrymore and the Oscars are already flatlining.

But, thanks to a contractual loophole, one awards show that SAG did allow actors to attend was last night's SAG awards. And, knowing that this might be their only chance to be pictured in a newspaper looking massively overdressed and buffed to within an inch of their lives on a red carpet, just about every actor alive decided to turn up.

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie were there, Tom Cruise was there, Daniel Day-Lewis was there, Cate Blanchett was there, Eva Longoria was there, that annoying scrawny woman from Grey's Anatomy was there, her off Will & Grace was there, Burt Reynolds was there – and by our calculations we're pretty sure that those are all the actors alive at the moment.

But what about the SAG awards themselves? Surely, with the world treating the show as a kind of substitute Oscars, SAG could really pull the rug out from everyone's feet and award trophies to some refreshingly left-field choices. Or perhaps it'd just lob awards at the actors everyone expected instead. Guess.

The winner of the SAG award for Best Male Actor In A Leading Role went to Daniel Day-Lewis for There Will Be Blood – adding to his Golden Globe, his LA Film Critics award, his New York Film Critics award and his third runner-up prize in the Speen Parish Council summer fete's Guess The Weight Of The Cake contest. No Country For Old Men also won two SAG Awards – Best Ensemble and Best Supporting Actor – adding to its already impressive award tally. And Julie Christie also won for her role in that film about the old lady, just like she has everywhere else.

And, since the SAG awards also honour television performances, we should add that The Sopranos won stuff, 30 Rock won stuff and The Office won stuff. But nobody really cares about any of that because it's just TV.

And that's all. So long as the writers' strike continues it's just this and the Grammys. And, you know, if the WGA wants to come over here and picket the Brits as a favour to us next month, we'd appreciate it.

Read more:

Stars Seize Their Chance to Shine at SAG Awards – New York Times 

There Will Be Blood - the film about how many words Daniel Day-Lewis can say in a funny voice within the space of two and a half hours – is really doing rather well at winning awards this year.

Although it has already won a bunch of awards already, There Will Be Blood is still gaining momentum all the time, picking up a handful of awards at Saturday night's National Society Of Film Critics awards in New York for Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Director and Best Cinematography. Now, the continuing success of There Will Be Blood - along with that of its rivals No Country For Old Men and Into The Wild – might make it look as if I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry has been edged out of the Oscars running, but we still live in eternal hope that Blake Clark gets the credit he deserves for imbuing Crazy Homeless Man with such dignified pathos.

So it looks like awards season might be dead on its feet already thanks to the WGA strike banning everyone from going to the Golden Globes, but the clever kids at the National Society Of Film Critics knows a simple way around that. Instead of hosting a glitzy gala evening full of stars dressed up to the nines heartily congratulating themselves on being able to make films about important things like war and malformed babies, the National Society Of Film Critics instead just gathers its members up in a restaurant and lets them shout at each other until some winners get decided.

And the National Society Of Film Critics awards are even more refreshing because they have absolutely no bearing on the outcome of the Oscars either. Like last year when it decided that Pan's Labyrinth was the best film and everyone else was fawning over The Departed, for example, or any of the other times when the National Society Of Film Critics got it wrong that we can't be bothered to find out about at the moment.

That's good news for us, but rubbish news for There Will Be Blood, because it swept the board at Saturday's National Society Of Film Critics awards so probably won't get a sniff come Oscar night. There Will Be Blood managed to win awards for best picture, best director, best cinematography and best actor for Daniel Day-Lewis' compelling portrayal of a man who talks quite slowly in an unusual voice, adding to the tally of awards that already includes an LA Film Critics trophy and a New York Film Critics trophy.

Apart from that, though, the National Society Of Film Critics awards went just as you'd expect. Julie Christie won an award because she played a woman with a degenerative mental condition in a film, Cate Blanchett won an award because she played an old musician in a vaguely biopic-ish film, No End In Sight won an award because it's a documentary about the Iraq war and Casey Affleck won an award because it was getting late and everyone had been drinking a little bit by the time they got round to choosing the Best Supporting Actor prize.

We expect.

Read more:

National Critics Draw Blood – E! Online 

Since we'd watch a 14-hour movie about a slowly-hardening eczema scab if Daniel Day-Lewis was in, we've come to the conclusion that he's probably a fairly decent actor.

And that's not just our opinion, either – all the film critics in Los Angeles seem to think so, too. Last night was the LA Film Critics Association's turn to heap their shovel of opinion onto an already-boring awards season, and it's named There Will Be Blood, the Paul Thomas Anderson drama starring Daniel Day-Lewis as a rich man who speaks slowly and leaves lots of pauses in sentences where you wouldn't really expect them to, as the best film of the year. All in all at the annual vote, There Will Be Blood won four awards and came runner-up in three other categories, blowing the competition out of the water.

Don't worry, I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry, we're sure you're still in with a chance somewhere, and we'll keep wearing your garish promotional baseball cap until you get the recognition you deserve.

Los Angeles is a city built on movies. Well, movies and the 90 billion photographers whose sole aim in life is to take a picture of Britney Spears' genitals. And since LA is a movie city, it's only right that the LA film critics should have their own awards ceremony where, say, the film critics of Cockermouth shouldn't. Cockermouth isn't a movie city. Cockermouth is a small town in Cumbria with two cycle shops and a slightly rude-sounding name.

And when better for the LA Film Critics Association to announce the winners of their awards than right at the start of awards season before the average citizen gets so overwhelmed by all the little groups and organisations deciding what films they like that they beat themselves around the head with a boot to kick-start some kind of self-induced coma?

So that's what's happened – the LA Film Critics Association announced the winners of its annual awards last night, and it was an incredible night for There Will Be Blood, the admittedly impressive-looking new movie by Paul Thomas Anderson. As well as winning Best Movie, There Will Be Blood also picked up Best Director, Best Production Design and Best Actor for Daniel Day-Lewis, whose role as a grumpy old oil baron is Very Important because he doesn't make many films any more and he leaves a lot of big pauses between his words in the trailer.

And There Will Be Blood could have won even more, getting second-place nods for cinematography, music and screenplay. All of this LA Film Critics Association love has shunted There Will Be Blood out to become an Oscar front-runner along with No Country For Old Men and, when some of the Academy see us in our natty baseball cap, I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry.

Other winners announced by the LA Film Critics Association included Romanian bag of fun 4 Months, 3 Weeks And 2 Days and buddy-cop movie The Diving Bell And The Butterfly. It might be that you're more used to these titles by the time the Oscars come around, it might be that you're not, or it might be that even the sound of someone saying the word 'Oscars' to you will literally make your brain explode because it's all you've heard for three months solid. Tenner says it's the latter.

Read more:

L.A. film critics go for `Blood' – LA Daily News