George Lucas must have more dead horses on his Skywalker ranch than the stables after the Grand National.
How else could he keep flogging them?
Not content with ruining his own credibility with the Star Wars prequel trilogy and Indiana Jones vs the Aliens, Lucas has announced that he has 2 series worth of scripts ready for his new live action Star Wars TV show.
The new show is to be set between the end of Revenge of the Sith and the beginning of A New Hope, which will hopefully mean that it will average out and be somewhat tolerable to watch.
Rumour has it that the show is also to focus on minor characters within the Star Wars universe and not go anywhere near the pesky Skywalker clan and the acting gene that skipped a generation when it came to Anakin.
Do you remember that guy in the Cantina scene? You know the one, he was milling about in the background minding his own business and having a quiet drink before quietly slipping out without causing much of a disturbance to anyone?
Well, thanks to George Lucas, you're now going to get to see his entire life story, IN HIGH DEFINITION!
The screen will sparkle as we see what lead him to Mos Eisley spaceport and how he found out about the Cantina and it's delicious mix of beverages and death sticks.
Why is he drinking anyway? Is it to escape the stresses of his life? Maybe he lost some money on the pod races and was trying to find a loan shark before the Storm Troopers got to him and mistakenly believed that his droids were the ones they were looking for.
Well, thanks to the genius that is George Lucas, we're about to find out!
Variety clearly is the spice of life.
Follow hecklerspray on Twitter or join our Facebook group or BUY ONE OF OUR STUPID T-SHIRTS!
Won't someone says
WON’T SOMEONE PLEASE TAKE THE FUCKING PEN/LAPTOP/COMPUTER AWAY FROM GEORGE AND STAB/BEAT/FLOG HIM WITH IT!!!
Fuck a rolling donut George, leave it alone.