Rihanna used to be a real top bitch in the music industry and could basically queef out a number one hit. Then she took a little break from making music and, much like her return to Instagram after being kicked off for constantly flashing her nips, the comeback did not return her to her head bitch in charge status. Let’s be real: her Instagramming and music game has been weak.
Rihanna has supposedly been working her ass off on her newest album titled R8, but apparently the whole thing is being scrapped now and started over because even she knows the album is pure shit. In her defense, she was probably really REALLY high when she recorded half the songs.
The first song that was released from the album was “FourFive Seconds” featuring Kanye West and Paul McCartney. However, “featuring Paul McCartney” nowadays basically just means he plays one of the instruments in the background. Way to utilize a motherfucking BEATLE Rih and Ye. But anyway, I liked that song. I thought it was different for Rihanna and it was a bit of a jam.
Then she released her second song, “Bitch Better Have My Money” which sounded like the chorus to a 1996 Lil’ Kim song except there was no amazingly filthy Lil’ Kim raps between Rihanna singing, so that song was kind of a dud.
Then finally she released “American Oxygen” which is hands down the worst song Rihanna has EVER released. I mean, it’s not even remotely listenable and this is coming from someone who legit enjoys the Britney Spears and Iggy Azalea song “Pretty Girls”.
All 3 songs performed less than stellar on the charts and really failed to make much of a buzz around her new album and apparently those were the 3 best ones she had, so I’m assuming R8 was going to be a total fucking mess and I’m super disappointed in Rihanna.
If Britney Spears can make a bangin’ album like “Blackout” while have a legit mental breakdown, you should be able to pull out some decent jams while you’re high on vacation. Get your shit together, girl.