It must be hard being Pippa Middleton; trying to be a serious business woman and gallivanting around London, made all the more difficult because everyone knows you for being the one with the arse that stole your sister?s wedding day.
Poor, poor Pippa.
But a tabloid picture editor has come forward and announced that newspapers would be offered around 300 or 400 pictures PER DAY of the fitter Middleton, none of which are of her arse.
Paul Silver or the Daily Mail says:
“At the moment we have a situation where there must be nine or 10 agencies outside her door every day”
Hold on a minute? The Daily Mail?
Oh, we get it, all those pesky photographers camped outside Pippa?s pad must be a new breed of immigrant paedo paps that have come over here to make our beloved tabloid photographers jobless and bother our favourite Royal relations.
Those utter bastards.
The Mail obviously never run any of these photos, after all, what paper would run pictures of a woman we never hear speak and is effectively just a bit of posh totty that we?d like to think we have a crack at because she's not an actual Princess like her older sister.
So this abhorrent invasion into Pippa?s private life is all for nothing, those immigrant paedo paps should just take their cameras back to where they come from and leave us all to bask in the warm glow of Pippa?s loveliness, sans pictures of her posterior splashed across the pages. [Her arse isn’t literally splashing on the pages, Ed]
But oh wait, some of those 400 pictures sent to the tabloids everyday actually make it into the papers, because no matter how mundane the middle class Middleton is, her face still sells papers, because it's attached to that arse that everyone keeps harping on about as if they're banging you over the head with a double cheeked cushion, shouting, ?SHE?S GOT A NICE ARSE, DON?T YOU REMEMBER!??
We should all chip in and get Paul Silva a replica Queen?s Guard outfit that he can wear on that high horse of his.
Cookie Monster says
I am sorry, and I do get the joke, but frankly, my arse does a lot more for me than Pippa’s, and with quite a bit less blue hair, I might add.