Hey, here’s a blast from the past – remember Pete Doherty? Sure you do. Tall lad. A little bit smelly-looking.
Dressed like Shabby off Big Brother. Went out with a supermodel. Took a lot of drugs. Used to be in a mediocre band and then gave it up to join the universe’s most vastly inept band. All his fans are incredibly sensitive and a bit thick. Yeah, you remember Pete Doherty.
Anyway, Pete Doherty is back in the news after his band Babyshambles were bottled during a festival set at the weekend. It’s thought that the perpetrator was relatively easy to identify, because he was the only one in the audience. And he had earplugs in. And he thought he was watching a Babyshambles tribute act made up of three elderly transvestites and a shop-soiled sex doll. Babyshambles aren’t very good, that’s essentially our point.
We haven’t written about Pete Doherty for a while because, really, who cares any more? He isn’t going out with Kate Moss with any more. Hearing about his tedious drug escapades stopped being interesting in about 2006. All his music sounds like the noise a confused old man would make if you pushed him into a hall of mirrors and paid an incompetent busker to chase him around. He, quite honestly, looks like he might smell of urine. So what’s the point?
Well, we’ve decided to temporarily lift our Pete Doherty embargo. But only because a number of people hurled bottles at him this weekend, and his bandmate threw a prissy little tizz about it, and that’s sort of hilarious. Metro reports:
Pete Doherty’s band Babyshambles were bottled during an appearance at T in the Park and told fans to “beat the fuck out” of each other. After being pelted by bottles, guitarist Mik Whitnall urged fans to attack the guilty parties. Frontman Doherty finished his set by chucking his microphone into the crowd.
Now, it’s important to remember that Pete Doherty doesn’t deserve treatment like this. Just because he sings like a drunk bombardier having a stroke, remember that he does have at least one GCSE, which makes him a genius or whatever. He absolutely doesn’t deserve thi… oh, wait. Yes, yes he does deserve treatment like this. Sorry, we were confusing Pete Doherty with everyone on the planet who isn’t Pete Doherty.
Still, join us next time for some similar news about an equally relevant figure. Maybe the bassist out of Swing Out Sister will accidentally drop their phone down the toilet or something. Exciting!
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Mithaearon says
Damn no video :(
hoohaahee says
A talentless cunt of the lowest order.
And I’m only saying that about the man because I’m restraining my real opinion.
Nici says
leave pete alone, he’s the best musician EVER!! haaaww I love this man <3