Paul McCartney’s concert in Israel next week could be his last – and not because he’ll soil himself getting to the high note in Hey Jude and retire out of shame.
No, instead, the concert in Israel could be Paul McCartney’s last because a gang of Islamic extremists are running around telling everyone that they’re going to kill him if he follows through with his plan to play there.
However, Paul McCartney has shown admirable strength of character by refusing to bow to these religious fanatics. In fact, if anything this death threat has just strengthened Paul McCartney’s resolve – not only will he play the concert in Israel, but he’s even going to turn it into a live album, entitled Paul McCartney Live Behind Six Inches Of Reinforced Plexiglass Inside A Sealed Lead Box Surrounded By Several Bodyguards And At Least A Couple Of Tanks.
You know what offends Islamic fundamentalists the most about the west? No, it’s not our consumerist lifestyles, our swaggering cultural dominance or our free and easy attitudes to sex and stimulants – it’s the bloody Frog Song.
Seriously, al Qaeda didn’t even exist until Paul McCartney wrote The Frog Song. There they were, Osama bin Laden, Ayman al-Zawahiri and Abu Hamza, all sitting round the kitchen table discussing the Pauly Shore movie Biodome when – bam! – all of a sudden The Frog Song by Paul McCartney came on the radio and everyone more or less instantly decided to bring western civilisation to its knees. True story.
Since then, the terrorists have been determined to finish Paul McCartney off, and now it looks like they might have their chance. Next Thursday Paul McCartney is going to play a concert in Tel Aviv, which would be fine except for all the Islamic extremists carping on about killing him if he does. But, as The New York Times reports, McCartney is unbowed:
Paul McCartney has refused to cancel his concert in Israel, despite threats from Islamic militants, the Israeli newspaper Haaretz reported. The response follows comments made by Omar Bakri Muhammad, a militant Lebanese Islamic activist, in an interview. Mr. Bakri said, “If he values his life, Mr. McCartney must not come to Israel… He will not be safe there. The sacrifice operatives will be waiting for him.”
Oh God, this is worse than we thought. Paul McCartney is relevant again. Ugh.
Anyway, it’s absolutely right that Paul McCartney should play on in Israel despite the death threats. If he can see off threats from Gordon Ramsay he can definitely see off threats from organised terrorist groups. You know what they say – if Israelis aren’t being charged through the nose to listen to an old man with a face like a ruptured hot water bottle sing a load of 40-year-old songs in a way that can’t even come close to replicating the original versions before being relentlessly hounded to buy an overpriced programme and tour T-shirt then the terrorists have won.
Actually, Paul McCartney should be safe, because terrorism experts have already dismissed the death threats as not credible. For some reason the Islamic activists sort of went off the idea of blowing up Paul McCartney’s car with a mortar as soon as they realised that he’d divorced Heather Mills and she wouldn’t be coming with him. Funny that.
Anyway, let’s just hope that Paul McCartney remains safe duing his time in Israel. Not because we care about him or anything, but with John Lennon already shot and George Harrison already stabbed, can you imagine what an obnoxious bighead Ringo Starr would turn into if Paul McCartney got blown up by a terrorist and he was the last one left? God, it’d be unbearable.
Daz says
Funny!
dhani says
Fuck you. Give respect or shut up.
mella says
YOu are an idiot. Paul McCartney has forgotten more about music….GOOD MUSIC- – then you will ever know.
Again- you are an idiot.
Julian Mentat says
Don’t laugh. Militant Islamic groups are getting smarter all the time.
This is the natural evolutionary result of exploding your stupidest members.
Gilbert Wham says
If that’s the case mella, d’you think someone could remind him of it? Cos he’s been rubbish for ages now…
Peter says
No one is threatening him. This article is complete bullshit
Emma says
Are you serious?
I agree with dhani, give the legend some damn respect.
J Bollocks says
Why, oh why doesn’t someone mention the Oompa-Loompa’s?
Graham says
McCartney and music in the same sentence? Wow, I never thought that possible… The Liverpool Oratory “classical” piece that he wrote, really proved his lack of any musical discernment; for crying out loud he’s a bass player and a crap one at that. Wings and “Band on the Run” says it all, it really does.
Emma says: “give the legend some damn respect”… respect is earned, try to learn that as its relevant in all phases of life.
The man is a money grubbing hack with all of the charm and charisma of a bowel re-section. I’ve seen him play three times and on each occasion he was crap, and the first time was in ’64, when he was supposedly hitting his peak period. I have had better peak periods after eating a prawn vindaloo and drinking 8 pints of best bitter. McCartney a legend? In his own mind perhaps, but else wise forget it, and certainly not with his peers.
Gregory F. Fegel says
I wrote Paul McCartney, but I meant ‘Paul McCuntney’.
the dave says
Just shows – imbeciles CAN write articles on the web. Other than that – its useless. Stu’s parents were probably listening to Paul when when they screwed him into existence…..
suraci says
John Lennon took a stand against Vietnam and generally seemed to be the one with a conscience, whereas Paul was always the hard nosed businessman. He must still be that way to play a gig in a place like Israel, but at least a few Palestinians will be able to hear the music as they wait for hours at checkpoints to be molestd by IDF goons, or swelter in secret prisons tied to chairs for hours, or shot at by tanks as they throw stones.
Paul knows who pays his salary, which group dominates the media, hence this gig. I hope he dies figuratively rather than literally, he was always a bit too lightweight for my tastes, musically and now morally.
Rob O'Loughlin says
Id be considerably more worried by israeli terrorism as it’s MOSSAD and it’s CIA and BIS buddies doing all the terrorism on behalf of their Secret Government fascist masters.
wideawake says
I agree with Peter
This article is a bunch of BS!
There are NO Islamic TERRORIST threatening the world or Paul McCartney!!!!!!
Oh! I’m sorry! I forgot there are but they work in special Ops of the NWO! BUT I don’t think they are worried about Paul McCartney.
What a JOKE!!!
Gregory F. Fegel says
I realized that the Beatles were effete snobs when they sang “Revolution” in 1968, telling us Yanks that we shouldn’t protest the Viet Nam War. The world doesn’t need any more of your silly love songs, McFartney. We didn’t need the ones you gave us.
Martin says
I like Dhani´s comment. First he/she uses the “F” word then asks for respect, then tells others to shut up. Ha ha..very funny.
As for the article. Definitely My kind of humor…..
Tom Lowe says
I’m with Dave: what a bunch of mindless crap.
What sort of a name is ‘Stu Heritage’? A typically fake yiddish one, no doubt.
Iagree with suraci says
right on Suraci….!
paul is just SO yesterday…!
J Bollocks says
Yuck! “Stu’s parents were probably listening to Paul when when they screwed him into existence…..”
Are you sure he had parents? I’ve sort of got the idea he was created “Golem” style (NO, not the crap JRRR Tolkien golem, the original one, you know, semen and some floor sweepings and a test-tube)
axiom says
do us a favour Al-CIA-da !
Dave says
Paul’s got temerity to stand up to these radical pressure groups,now let us discuss why people will NOT stand up to another pressure group-Israeli’s,AIPAC and Jews in general for their threats of getting professors fired who do not speak the appropriate line when it comes to Israel.
One can determine that this is the ultimate pressure group by the fact that you won’t even see articles in the mainstream that refer to its existence.
profnasty says
This is the artistic/spiritual Death of the Beatles. The warcrimes committed by Likud et al over the years have earned Israel a pariah status. For Paul McC***ney to play music there is blasphemy against the highest power…God. If God’s chosen set out to murder hundreds of their enemie’s children, it is time to find another God. I suggest Jesus Christ.
Nonya says
More propaganda to get the western world to get behind the military industrial complex and its desire to rid the world of people who are willing to rid the world of them.
mallee says
“If he values his life, Mr. McCartney must not come to Israel… He will not be safe there. The sacrifice operatives will be waiting for him.”
The only extremists threatening this supporter of genocide and ethnic cleansing are known as MOSSAD.
Kinda hope they succeed. The Palestinians sure as hell couldn’t be any worse off.
Rick G - Atlanta says
Fuck You! and all the nutter extreeeemists. go find your fucking virgins.
Steve says
More than likely it was not a Muslim making the threats. By way of deception….
MCS says
It´s no make sense.
They attack icons of other culture to win one war that´s no exist.
One people that´s make music for peace!
They are attacking the peace.
They only know the war?
They will receive one day who they make.
You can launch the seed of your intent at air.
But if one day, one of this seed create one tree…
You will receive the fruits.
Good or bad fruits.
What´s occur with tolerance?
dudu perky says
Give Ireland Back To The Irish
Give Egypt back to the Gyps
Give Libya back to the Libbies
And Yoko back to the Japs
DocReality says
Nice words Suraci, that sums up my view exactly.
Lennon is dead because he had power, Harrison too. Both deaths are highly suspicious. Lennon and Harrisons work against the military industrial complex was a threat, both worked to better people opinions. McCartney is a sellout. He did create some good music with the others, but he has no conviction and as a musician lacked the soul the rest of the group had, except Ringo, but hell he is a drummer.
Tod G. says
Yeah that was the genesis of al Qaeda, right! Wait, “al Qaeda” was a database of assets of the CIA. The name is slang for database. Research Operation Cyclone under Carter. Realize that the CIA runs the US embassy in Jeddah Saudia Arabia and still to this day gives visas to all kinds of malcontents who can be manipulated into creating this era’s boogeymen.
Jimbo says
McCartney RRRRRAWWWWWXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!!!!!!
Carlito says
I cannot imagine the reaction to them carrying out such a threat.Paul Mcartney is loved throughout the world and I think the anger would boil over all over Europe and America. It would totally galvanize a lot of people against them. These bastards are going to take it too far one day and the backlash against them will be quick and total. It will be their turn to live in fear.
johnny says
Ringo Starr was always a true gentleman and still is.
johnny says
this type of trash should not be published.
In this case nobody is right.
Cyrus Arm says
Paul Is Protected. Islamist Trying to harm him bring destruction on their own heads. Dumb asses.
Cyrus Arm says
Paul is western civilization.An attack on him is an attack on the west.Islamist who do such a thing are doing an insane act.They will pay for such an act.Kihilhe
trescott Palmer says
The beatles gave a lot of good music But that was yesterday. Today Paul Mcartney is musicly dead. I was shocked to find out that Paul was one of the investors in Montery Pop Festival. Also he invested in Mr Jimmy Hendrix. It appears nothing has changed. i still believe in peace. And it starts with me.
me says
Paul died in the 60’s and his replacement sucked and continues to do so
gir says
Western Civilization died in the 60s and its replacement sucked and continues to do so
TrueScouser says
Paul McCartney is a crap musician whose only morals came from his much maligned but lovely wife, Linda. Since her death he has made a holy show of himself at every turn and shown himself as the idiot money obsessed tosser that he is. John and George were the true creativity in the Beatles, may they rest in peace, for I am sure they will be turning in their graves at the thought of this talentless, thoughtless imbicile potentially playing some of their music in an illegal apartheid state that is israel.For the sake of us all I hope he likes living behind walls on stolen occupied land and stays there. Not in my name McCartney, shame on you.
Julian Mentat says
What annoys Islamists about us, is the Koran.
No, not the fact that we haven’t read it; the fact that we’ve read OTHER things, and if we read the Koran we might say something like “Hang on, this page says outer space is full of transparent spheres. Rubbish!”
John says
DocReality: In what way was Harrison’s death suspicious? He died of lung cancer…As for McCartney being a crap musician, come off it. I know it’s been the fashion for years to say how crappy and musically bankrupt Macca is but as a musician he has achieved more than most others in the last 45 years – so if he is crap, every other musician since must have been absolute shite!
TrueScouser says
John, sorry i must have been asleep when mccartney “achieved more than most in the last 45 years” (although your statement therefore excludes every musician under 50 years), so please remind me of his “achievments”. Married a one legged gold digger, sorry forgot about that.
jason says
Interesting, how shallow so many comments are here. First, the writer of this article should find work else where because to criticize an artist who wrote such great music and feel justified in doing so is not worthy of such attention. And the joker who criticized Paul’s bass playing obviously is not a musician, and if so, not a good one.
pete says
Hey, you leave poor little Paul alone! If he needs a few more million, he can entertain in the Terrorist nation of Israel! It’s his right! But, Like the sailors on the USS LIBERTY, he best watch his ass from the FRONT,…not the back. Because when Mossad slits his throat and blames it on the Muslims to get you pathetic bunch of Lemmings to pour out your Christian “love” on the middle east, it’ll be end game for him, (and your spawn too, cuz it’ll be your yankee asses dying for the elite and Zionist Israel in Iran when the Big Bear lets loose. Wonder how all you “heroes” will perform against a REAL threat, not a tiny nation of people barely able to feed themselves let alone hurt the big bad U.S. ROFL, hell, your own idiocy coupled with the Bush Crime family/Terrorist Israel have done more damage to your country than Muslims ever DREAMED of doing. Can you imagine the raw excitement the foul swine must feel? So easily they manipulate 300 million drooling idiots to “fiddle” while they RAPE you from within your own borders.
Gilbert Wham says
Wow. I know Wings were rubbish, but you people are fucking nuts.
anyonewhovotesforademorrepdoesntknowwhatshappening says
As usual, not many IQs above 100.
mughal says
you prick you deserve what heather did to you what do except someone to fall to your feet serve you right i wish she screwed you more
scottwood says
Loved the article good for a laugh, and although I was a Lennon fan, and still am. Paul deserves to live his life in the way he sees fit, not as you muckers dictate . As for the state of Isreal, God help them to continue to exist with all you anti semetic,zionist paranoid malcontents. Find any conspircy you like but it wasnt Isreal that declaired war on westen civilization, it was your Islamonazis. If it gives you comfort to think the world trade center was imploded by George Bush and Hezbola , and Arafat werent murdering bastards along with all the other counter, counter reactionshist revinishit crap enjoy. I cant believe the world has turned into a punch bowel for hard ass ignorent hate mongers like you to float in. As for me Ill take what the Beatles stood for and what Paul is a co founder and still belives and is still singin has my good wishes and support, remember All You Need is Love.
magnetite says
Oh great. Now I want to drink Islamonazade while I have my bowels punched by an anti-Semitic Zionist. Scottwood must be a text-only viral for the Interfaith Fisting and Soft Drink Marketing Board. Advertising’s come on a bit since Beanz Meanz Heinz, hasn’t it?
Mike in Toronto says
All religions suck, Islam is just the worst of the lot. The more I learn about Islam, the more it reminds me of Nazism.
Ryan Angeles says
hey what the fuck you, you little bitch. your not fuckin funny at all so stop trying. And wheres your fuckin respect for paul, how do you feel that paul mccartney writes songs that touches everyones hearts around the world, and you write columns for magazines that everyone wipes their asses with?
Collin says
Why are you constantly ripping on one of the music greats? He still sings amazingly (I saw him live this month). Even if he is aging, it doesn’t matter because it happens to everyone! I’d like to see you try and sing in front of thousands of people at 68!
Jody says
Israel is a fascist state — the issue is not about McCartney. It’s about Zionist fraudsters who have manipulated governments, corporations, voters, families, and anyone else who gets in their way. People should research it for themselves.
Never vote a Jew into office. Never.
azfar says
this article is rubbish. thats all
Gary Bonura says
I can see the blood vessles popping out of your head from trying to be so clever. Save your blood vessles, it didn’t work.
apples says
at least your not p.c.
MEESHE says
I am tired of people showing so much disrespect to the Jewish people and Isreal. It’s time that people start seeing the light and realizing that there Gods chosen people , and I think that Paul is very brave to keep his word and play for them. The man is 68 years old and his still kicking ass for someone to write such nasty , wicked , disrespectful trash about him makes me sick to my stomach! He has brought so much happiness to people with the Beatles and his own work he deserves nothing but respect. I pray that God will keep him safe as for the people of Tel Aviv , they deserve to have some fun! So thank you Paul McCartney and good for you!