Oprah Winfrey rules all mediums; television, radio, magazines and – thanks to Screaming Round Lady Go-Go 100% – Japanese anime.
But there’s one medium that Oprah Winfrey hasn’t dabbled in for a while – movies. Sure, she was nominated for an Oscar for The Color Purple, but that was over 20 years ago.
So it’s great to hear that Oprah Winfrey has just signed a deal to make mini-series, movies, documentaries and series. Best of all, she’s making them all for HBO, so she can either be like The Sopranos and be intelligent and groundbreaking or be like Entourage and be annoyingly smug. You know, for a change.
There’s so much more to Oprah Winfrey than the mistaken belief that we all care about how fat she is as much as she does. Wherever you look, Oprah Winfrey has it nailed down. She’s got a TV show, she’s got magazines, you can listen to her on the radio and she’ll soon have an entire network devoted to nothing but a close-up of her face with fire reflected in eyes that’s accompanied by the sound of distant crying babies.
But that’s not enough for Oprah Winfrey. Oprah isn’t going to stop this inexorable march towards global domination until every child born on this planet is named Oprah and learns how to screech about free cars from a pointlessly young age. Or at least until she gets to make some low-grade movies and TV shows for HBO.
Which, hey, happen to be now. Although as far as drama goes, Oprah Winfrey is probably best-known for her Oscar-nominated performance in The Color Purple, but she’s also pretty handy behind the scenes, too – producing films and TV shows like Their Eyes Were Watching God, Before Women Had Wings and The Great Debaters.
And now, thanks to the deal she’s just signed with HBO, there’s going to be a bunch more where that came from. Reuters reports:
Oprah Winfrey’s production company has signed a deal to make movies, documentaries and series for cable channel HBO, Harpo Films and HBO said on Tuesday. Kate Forte, president of Harpo Films, said HBO offered a unique blend of format and creativity on television, “and the quality and range of their subjects are extraordinary.”
And, what’s more, you can swear and take your clothes off on HBO too, which is why the first three projects we expect Oprah Winfrey to work on with HBO are remakes of her old hits, like Their Tits Were Watching Porn, Before Women Had Fannies and, obviously, The Masturbators.
Since Oprah Winfrey is involved here, we’ve no doubt at all that this HBO deal will be a success. Just don’t expect to see Oprah herself making an appearance in any of the new shows – these days, when people see an old fat black woman on TV they just assume it’s Tyler Perry dressing up again and switch off.