Nicole Scherzinger has spoken of her desire to get her man to take her up the aisle.
Clean that filthy mind, you! We mean an actual aisle in a place of worship and not the back passage way that all her other lovers have taken her down, with convincing talk that it would only sting for a day or so afterward.
Well, whichever well-lubricated aisle she had in mind, the lead singer of the Pussycat Dolls has decided to get engaged around July, to her man candy Lewis Hamilton. Note to future gold diggers: just being with a man who is desired by many is not enough when you become rich and famous, ?Greedy Bitch-itus? has to overcome you and you have to marry the boy too.
Not that from what it seems anyone has bothered to tell Lewis, but his girlfriend Nicole is desperate to wed him and sees the pair of them getting engaged, all official like, in the next few weeks. We are pretty sure at least one of you needs to be drunk and at least one of you has to actually have proposed, in order for it to be a proper engagement, but Nicole is not a details person she is an action person. She is not a damn thinker, she is a doer!
After all, she did not manage to rise to the dizzying heights of the ?least ugly? singer in the Hot Tranny Mess Dolls from sitting around thinking all day. No siree. (She got there from scratching the furniture in her record bosses office and peeing on the carpet until they caved in).
Back to business, Nicole has spoken to a UK glossy magazine and says that in essence she is engaged in her own mind. Taking nothing as insignificant as the desires of her partner into consideration, the Doll revealed that she does not see why one would wait to marry when in love and that July in particular works for her to become engaged (hint, hint).
From Hello! magazine:
?Would I get married? For sure and, yeah, the Dolls can be the bridesmaids,? she said. ?But I have to get engaged first. Late July is looking good.?Marriage is a seal of love. On my solo album I have sung about how much I love that and what the whole process would mean to me. Who needs a reason to seal their love??
And you may like to know that, yes girls, pressuring a man to stay with you or in Nicole?s case propose to you is a fantastic way to keep him around. That won't give him the heeby jeebies at all and if you want to do something extra-special to convince him of your love, you want to get ?accidentally? knocked up as well… can't hurt*.
*hecklerspray staff and management do not condone getting preggers to keep anyone around, or pretending to be preggers by stuffing cushions up your jumper/ drinking too much fizzy pop and pointing to your full belly and trying to convince your partner that way. Get yourself a kitten rather than a baby, they are much more fun anyway.
This was a guest blog by Amy Grindhouse, who is just marvellous.
You! Follow hecklerspray on Twitter!
Julian Mentat says
>> On my solo album I have sung about how much I love that and what the whole process would mean to me
Really? I looked in vain for a song about blowing $10,000 on overpriced meals for a lot of relatives you don’t like.