It’s just a matter of days until New Moon is released. What’s it going to be like? Well, rubbish, obviously.

But forget that. New Moon! Yay! Anticipation for New Moon is at fever pitch – nobody knows anything about it. Well, unless they’ve downloaded it off the internet already. Or read the book. Or read the Wikipedia page for the book. Or watched any late-night European television commercials for homosexual chat lines. But forget all that too.

Because last night the New Moon premiere took place, which is important because it meant that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner all wore nice clothes. We don’t have the image rights to show you the clothes. But all’s not lost – we’ve got the next best thing.

You don’t have to be an expert on cinema to know that New Moon is going to be a sensation. It’s going to take everything that anyone loved about Twilight – the bad-haired sparkle pixie, the girl with the long face, the terrible Paramore soundtrack – and add so many werewolves and boy nipples and scenes featuring Tony Blair that it’s bound to reduce audiences to quivering, urine-soaked emo pandas within the first minute.

But before New Moon, we have to deal with the New Moon premiere, which took place last night in Los Angeles. The New Moon premiere was important because it gave fans the chance to see their favourite stars close-up, allowing them to answer big questions like ‘Are Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart really an item?’, ‘What does Taylor Lautner look like when he’s wearing clothes?’ and ‘My life really has gone terribly wrong somewhere down the line, hasn’t it?’

As with all premieres, though, the New Moon premiere gave everyone a chance to dress up to the nines and look effortlessly glamorous. We’d show you what the young New Moon stars wore, but sadly we can’t afford the image rights. So instead, we’ve employed a professional illustrator to create near-photographic recreations of their outfits, based on descriptions by MTV. Ready?

Robert Pattinson – MTV said:

Pattinson looked dashing, as the English gentleman wore a fitted black Gucci suit. And the ladies swooned over his tousled, highlighted hair.

Here’s how he looked…

Taylor Lautner – MTV said:

Lautner opted for a blue suit, pairing it with a tie and shirt in a similar shade. But his spiky hair and easygoing demeanor kept the look age appropriate and fun.

Here’s how he looked…

Kristen Stewart – MTV said:

Stewart really glammed it up, abandoning her usual grungy-cool style for a flowing, ethereal gown. But she did hold on to a bit of the trademark Stewart style with her messy, just-out-of-bed updo, with heavy eye makeup finishing the look.

Here’s how she looked…

You’re welcome, New Moon fans!

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