If there was ever an example of a grown man acting like a stubborn child, then we?d have to point in the direction of Morrissey [or ourselves – Ed]. We imagine that if he was still at school, he'd be the child cursing the sunshine on a warm sunny day and generally mooching around the playground with a storm cloud permanently attached to his head.
For those unfamiliar with Moz, he was the lead singer with the vastly overrated and generally annoying band The Smiths. At the time, Moz and his band of merry men might have looked like radicals, but by today's standards, he's just a whiny tit.
But to his credit Morrissey has stuck to his guns and protested his hatred for the royal family. Despite the rest of the country recently warming to William and Kate, Morrissey is still upset with the Winsors.
As you might of heard, there was recently a Royal Wedding. You probably missed our liveblog. And with the newspapers trying to whip up a frenzy of gatecrashers attempting to ruin the event, the day ended as a success with William and Kate looking like the sort of people who?d join you in the pub for a pint and give you ?1.50 for a kebab if you happen to be running low on funds. Not that they’d actually associate with scum like you and us.
We don't know if Morrissey likes William and Kate, but from what we've read over the weekend, he isn't a fan of the Queen, otherwise known as the grand supreme ruler of the United Kingdom. Oddly, he's been comparing the Queen to a dictator over the weekend. You know, one of those cute and cuddly types who butchers and kills their own people or just tortures them for shits and giggles.
Morrissey said:
“She would not hesitate to turn her tanks on the British people. The royal family, to me, are not England, and they are not the flag. So, therefore people can become misguided into believing that the Queen is the heart of England, and that she represents England. But she doesn't in the least. There are people like me who were not interested, and we're many in number, and we're not easily fooled. And we see the Queen as the ultimate dictator. And it is dictatorship. It's forced upon the British people.?
Yup, we got bored after reading the first sentence as well. Basically, Morrissey seems to be implying that the Queen is going to fire exploding corgis at us when we least expect it so we all cower under the might of Prince Phillip and Harry, as they parade around the country dressed as Nazis. This theory of Mozza’s however doesn't come as a surprise as he is known as a self opinionated twat who tends to spout utter rubbish whilst trying to get people to follow his own beliefs, kind of like some sort of dictator.
Just like us.
Unlike us, Morrissey is one of those pesky vegetarian types and recently demanded that when he performed at The Lokerse Feesten in Belgium, the whole festival had to be meat free. Just because the thought of a cheeseburger might make him do a small cry ? and that's without any onions being on the succulent meaty treat. One person telling a whole load of others what to do? That's not dictatorial at all!
Perhaps we could just put an end to Morrissey once and for all by constructing a thirty foot pentagram made entirely out of bacon outside of house.
Because it would be puerile and funny.
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Brickolas says
Haha. We had an exploding corgi for a while. It lived for 11 years. Then it died after that.
Essben says
You lost me at “Morrissey said”.
JoeMomma says
Seeing as Morrissey is the Grandfather of Emo. If he dies, will all the Emo kids revert back to normal? Or do we have to get rid of Robert Smith as well?
SewerUrchin says
I once made a facebook page about Morrissey for this very reason….
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Morrissey-is-a-twat/124190637604446