The last time Mickey Rourke put aside acting to focus on professional fighting, it ended as badly as you’d imagine.
It ended with Sylvester Stallone‘s Get Carter remake. Ugh. But Mickey Rourke isn’t a man who repeats his mistakes – apart from the mistake involving him having haphazard cosmetic surgery procedure done on his face. And that’s why Mickey Rourke has decided he’ll no longer fight at April’s Wrestlemania.
We’re appalled. Without Mickey Rourke, who at Wrestlemania will provide our fill of tragic, borderline-decrepit ageing beefcakes who essentially make their living as performing monkeys? All the other wrestlers? Oh.
Mickey Rourke is the king of bad ideas. Giving up acting at the height of his fame to become a largely rubbish professional boxer, apparently having all his plastic surgery performed by an angry gibbon with scalpels for hands, Another Nine 1/2 Weeks – these are not the actions of a man with a long-term goal.
And even now that Mickey Rourke is the toast of Hollywood after playing himself in the movie Look, It’s Mickey Rourke In A Blonde Wig, he still doesn’t seems to have given up his old addiction to bad ideas. That’s why he’ll soon be starring in the latest Sylvester Stallone film, why he’s officially become the face of amputated dog testicles, and why he’d been planning to have his face beaten into a concave plasticine pizza at this year’s Wrestlemania.
Earlier this week it was announced that, to pay tribute to those who inspired his role in The Wrestler, Mickey Rourke would be appearing at Wrestlemania this year, possibly by fighting Chris Jericho. And it would have been must-see entertainment, so long as your definition of ‘must-see’ involves an old man, two pairs of borderline-obscene lycra unitards, tens of thousands of rednecks and at least one career-threatening injury.
But now, we’re sad to report that Mickey Rourke has now backed out of Wrestlemania. Access Hollywood reports:
?Mickey was very honored to be asked as he has the greatest respect for WWE however he will not be participating in ?Wrestlemania,?? the actor?s rep said in a statement to Access Hollywood. ?He is focusing entirely on his acting career.?
This isn’t a huge surprise – if you saw this painfully awkward showdown between Mickey Rourke and Chris Jericho on Tuesday’s Larry King, you’ll know you may as well have spent three minutes watching a giant flashing sign reading ‘UNCOMFORTABLE SECOND THOUGHTS’…
Some are saying that Mickey Rourke is backing out of Wrestlemania because it would have been the quickest way for him to lose his Oscar. Playing a wrestler in a story that uncomfortably mirrors your own life is one thing – but actually being a wrestler for a night, without the opportunity to launch into a desperate tear-filled soliloquy at the end to show your emotional range? Piss off.
Would Sean Penn do that, huh? Would Sean Penn stand in the middle of an arena and have a chair smashed into his face by a seven-foot monster who’d been pumped full of steroids? No. No he bloody well wouldn’t.
Nice thought, though, isn’t it?
magnetite says
Curses. I was hoping he’d end up like my old Stretch Armstrong, whose arms eventually remained as twenty-inch long spaghetti strands with no sign of ever resuming their former shape.
Oh well. There’s still the hope that Jennifer Aniston will spontaneously combust with seething resentment at Brangelina just as Rourke gets his Oscar handed to him – covering the whole stage area with gore and flames and sparkly dress fragments.
Daisy M says
Your not in touch – and a bore – your media “high tower” has zero to do with what we love – and thats entertainment – and thats Mickey Rourke. Hes the one we like to watch – not you.
Tammy Harris says
Mickey Rourke, game, match, set, Sir. This young pup thinks he won something by talking to you the way he did, but anyone who has lived beyond the point of this smirky, punk-faced time of life will see the true winner, the real man, is you Sir. You keep this way of carrying yourself, and you will continue to soar. I just watched The Wrestler for the first time a few minutes ago on DVD, and I am in literally in awe. I’m sorry that in this note that I am note carrying myself as well as you did here on Larry King. I have lowered myself to this what’s his name again? Whatever, no matter. To this young man who has so much to learn–to his level. It is so easy to see, (the opposite of what the writer of this article saw, which no doubt he is at the same maturity level as the ah, “pro” wrestler here) that you are not afraid, but actually bemused at this guy. You are a clas act today, Mr. Rourke. I wish you all the best, and I am truly sorry for the loss of your beloved Loki. I’m so glad you had and have your dogs. I do know how that feels with three of my own (and a cat too). So, congratulations and to the kid wrestler here, do a little reading up on Mickey Rourke, he too was “punk” once. Perhaps you’ll save yourself a lot of grief if you do. No disrespect in tended, Mr. Rourke. Oh, and “Stuey?” Mickey Rourke referred to sinking very low at one time when he took a poor movie job just for the paycheck. I think we know you can identify with that son.
Tammy Harris