After a rousing day of learning his ABC?s, Michael Jackson was one of the only children who feared going home.
Instead of racing up his front path in order to chomp on sugar-loaded treats and watch Japanese cartoons where evil table lamps did battle with pandas that farted rainbows, he entered the Joe Jackson performance workshop.
People in white lab coats and thick-rimmed glasses tell us that the childhood you experience moulds you for the future. Based on that argument we didn't turn out that badly, apart from that cheese grater fetish. Compare that with Michael Jackson, who’s just been accused of having a bit of a thing for the Nazi regime. Perhaps he thought the Jewish population got sent to concentration camps because they were unruly at times. Either way: eek.
The great thing about Michael Jackson was that there were so many ways you could relate to the man. What did Phil Collins do? Inspire slap-headed bald men everywhere to make crap records and then promote a brand of chocolate with a monkey drummer? Balls to that. At least Michael Jackson had a full-on fireworks display in his adverts. Even if it was an accident.
Alcoholics got to sing the praises of Michael Jackson through his love of Jesus Juice. Whilst it sounds like the end product of a group of religious cult members pissing in bottles and giving it that distinctive taste with a gob of spit, this isn't the case. Instead it was a polite way of Michael Jackson telling us he was a bit of a wine fan but wasn?t quite at the stages of alcoholism. Hooray for childlike nicknames. Perhaps he called his medication names such as ?sweet treats? and ?yum yums? with Dr. Conrad Murray being the stand in double for Willy Wonka.
So what's next on the Michael Jackson list of random collectables? We all know he had so much money that he could afford to throw it away on anything he likes. According to The Daily Mail, these allegedly included a collection of documentaries. Nothing too criminal there you'd think, but the films were a bit specialist Some would say off the wall and a little bit bad. The Daily Mail explains further:
?Michael Jackson had a secret stash of Nazi documentaries that he kept at his Neverland home. He allegedly had a collection of memorabilia and hunted down specialist video sellers who could discreetly sell him hard-to-find films and documentaries. Nazi memorabilia seller Norman Scherer claims to have helped Jackson form ‘a really good collection’, supplying him with titles such as Nazis: Of Pure Blood, Oasis of the Zombies and Hitler’s Children.?
Christ, that could have meant that Michael Jackson could have commanded an army and forced us all into dance schools where if we couldn't make the pavement light up around us, serious whippings would have been in order. We?d have had to battle this evil system with the melodic tones of indie music ? the natural repellent to R&B/soul music.
However, we welcome the discovery of Nazi documentaries at Jackson?s house, honestly. Rather a stash of those than a bunch of sticky children’s comics.
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Bobby says
Indie Music sucks!
Bo Tat says
Wow, this article is some serius psychiatric stuff.
The one who wrote this should be go to university.
A good look inside the mind of a …….yeah……what was Michael Jackson actualy? Multiple persolity disorder?
I did like his art though. Sad he has gone….but I think mostly he is the one most to blame. He dind’t realize it. Witch makes him a perfect study of a screwed up mind. For a university.
Ohm shante.
Steve Charnock says
… Laidlow!
BAB DA FLARE says
SOMEONE TELL ME WHY DOES THIS WEBSITE CONTIUNE TO HATE ON MJJ! SO WHAT PLEASE PEOPLE HE IS GONE SO JUST LET SHIT BE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ian says
The guy who sold them to Jackson said he was fascinated by the costumes and marching. Makes sense given his wardrobe and dance choreography.
Of course organizations like TMZ, the NY Post neglect to mention that, and Norman Scherer took exception with them for omitting that. Chances are he’d be miffed at hecklerspray calling him a Nazi memorabilia salesman too.
Barbara Straughn says
Is this a generation thing? or are you just plain ignorant?
If you were born in the late 1950’s or early 1960’s you will remember that the only films we had repeatedly, every weekday (if you were lucky enough) – ever weekend and every Christmas – were War Films. There was the odd cowboy & indian movie to counteract the boredom, but mainly it was WW2 Films and documentaries such as World at War which went on for about 2 years I think. They were fascinating to us because we were brought up hearing stories first hand by our parents who had lived through these experiences. We loved the music – such as Vera Lynn and the Glenn Miller orchestra. I made sure that my children knew all about the 2nd world war as part of their education seeing as schools today see fit to ignore that it ever took place. But despite all this – my sons and I are full of love for all humanity, regardless of colour or religion; we devote an enormous part of our spare time and earnings to supporting charities around the world and my sons are about to embark on a year’s travelling when they are physically going to work as volunteers. Your arguments are misguided and misleading and your assumptions and statements – not only ignorant and inflammatory, but downright insulting to intelligent human beings! You really do need to raise your ‘journalistic’ levels a hell of a lot to warrant any serious interest in your writing. Oops sorry, forgot – the ’13’ decide what you can publish don’t they? Nothing to do with you whatsoever is it? “Anything, anything for money, lie for it, die for it, even sell your soul to the devil ……. anything …..”
rochelle says
Here we go again!! Just because some clown makes a claim that he supplied Michael Jackson with Nazi documentaries how the hell do we know this is true? If it is, and he thinks the world cares, why didn’t he make this claim when MJ was alive? What is he trying to achieve by brining up this irrelevant garbage now? IS this supposed to be “breaking news”? I think NOT!!! I’m sick to death of people digging up garbage about Michael now that he is dead. It was done way too much while he was alive. No wonder the man couldn’t sleep. Now that he is gone, people should have more respect for Michael than that. If you didn’t like him then leave it alone and move on! This man did alot of good things for MANY human beings while he was alive. How many articles did you publish about that? Can you name even half of the charities that he donated his money to or name a few of the people that he helped out during his life? Just to enlighten you, Michael gave to numberous charities, and helped save many peoples lives by giving them money to have operations they wouldn’t have been able to afford on their own. Remember Ryan White, the teenage boy with AIDS who died in the 80’s? (Also the one he wrote the song GONE TOO SOON for.) Ryan’s mother said MJ not only made generous donations to the AIDS foundation, but he also gave Ryan’s family a generous amount of money after his death. MJ also donated proceeds to songs he had written to tragedies(Tsunami relief fund) and causes like starvation in Africa (remember WE ARE THE WORLD?) Also, he helped save a small childs life by helping to find a liver for him when this boy was close to death, but for some reason trash tabloids never get around to reporting these facts about Michael. It’s very sad this man lived and died and never got a fair “pat on the back” for the good things he’d done. So if you can’t stop accentuating the negative stories about MJ, you should just leave it alone and let this poor man rest in peace.
Barbara Straughn says
Don’t worry about mysteriously losing the comment – I have it saved!
Krishnesh Guataneenla, Chaatlanaish Province says
Please, donut be afraid, fellows and fans of the true, the king of pops, the Micheal Jackson, for he will will he not, be so angry at this man, Micheal Ladlow, whose message, and indeed, its purpose, is to hate our king of pops. His, surely, his time, it will come, and, then, when it comes, he will, I hope, and I believe it too, he will, without doubts, be faced with the king of pops, Micheal Jackson, in heaven’s gates, and there he, will surely, be trialled, judged. Krishnesh Guataneenla, Chaatlanaish Province.
Sara says
I am interested in Nazi’s and i am Jewish!!! Plus one of his best friends was Rabbi S. (i forgot how to spell his name!!!) and he said that he loved all religions.
LADYDON says
THE MEDIA IS SATAN THE DEVIL GREATEST AND MOST USED TOLL
BeeCharming says
Check yourself in and get some therapy.
Billy says
Anyone who still takes these “press” releases seriously needs to rethink it. My advice to you is never take up the profession of gun fighter because you are way too sloooowwwww. You are being fed BS by the master himself people, wake up!!!
Your life is meaningless Matthew Laidlow. says
I just vomited a little bit in my mouth.
This says so much about the idiot that you are Matthew and nothing about the person Michael Jackson was.
The sooner you get your pathetic ass sued, the better. Maybe then you’ll bother to learn what humour is. Is this personal enough for you, you dick?
missdeniseb says
So much to write about assumptions once again… The Daily Mail you’re citing and all of you web sites aren’t even asking yourselves the question of what is it you mean when you say someone is a Nazi fan. What do you mean?
Ode to the asinine says
Hey jealous sicko, you missin’ the chance to go to town on the revelation that his mother still struggles to cope? What’s the matter, can’t get inspired? Go on, reach deep down into that void where your dignity and self-respect should be and dredge up something vacuous with which to attack a dead guy yet again so you can buy yourself some importance. We all know that if you had any talent someone would have noticed it by now…….. but here you are at Shleppersbray.
JoeMomma says
Come… come… my little mindless MJ followers flood all of Hecklerspray with all your intelegebleistic comments.
hoohaahee says
“It
Maria says
Hoohaahee, go screw yourself, you mindless nobody.