Madonna. If she’s not being close friends with boys young enough to be her son, she’s trying to show the world her labia in increasingly disturbing music videos. But Madonna might be laying low for a while.
Because Madonna, if reports are to be believed, has just had a hernia operation. Which is bad news for Madonna – as a hernia can be an excruciatingly painful thing to happen to anybody, but good news for everyone else – as it means that Madonna probably won’t make any more music videos where she tries to lick her own vagina in a tiny pair of knickers.
It seems as if – between larking about with Gorillaz at the Grammys last week
and accepting a Brit Award this week – Madonna (CDs) popped into a hospital to have
some work done on a hernia that she had. According to Madonna’s
“She had a minor procedure for a hernia and is absolutely fine now.”
are no other details about Madonna’s affliction, but all hernias tend
to be pretty disgusting. A hernia usually occurs when the abdominal
wall develops a weakness or hole, allowing organs or guts to poke out
willy-nilly. Whether or not Madonna’s hernia is a result of her
knackering herself after falling off a horse last August remains to be
However, if Madonna’s doctors want to advise her to avoid wearing
granny porn leotards for a while, there’s a cheeky £20 in it for them
[story by Stuart Heritage]