They were the golden couple of bike-riding cancer victims and horrible MOR country-rock singers everywhere. And yet Lance Armstrong and Sheryl Crow have split up right before their wedding.
There’s bound to be a reason for the Armstrong/Crow split, but – for now – the usual nonsense about still having deep love and respect for each other is still being bandied about. Perhaps Sheryl Crow will write a dreadful song all about the split. Or perhaps Lance Armstrong will, um, ride a bike about it.
That last one didn’t really work, did it?
Individually, Sheryl Crow (CDs) and Lance Armstrong have a lot to answer
for. It’s Lance’s fault that everyone wears those ridiculous wristbands
all the time – after his Livestrong wristbands kick-stared the whole trend in the
first place. And if Sheryl Crow is directly responsible for spoiling
our breakfast on Saturday by making the bad CD that was playing in the
cafe where we were eating. We’re a vengeful lot, us.
But, despite their faults as individuals, Sheryl Crow and Lance
Armstrong made a lovely couple. They met during a charity event in
October 2003, and immediately hit it off. He proposed to her on – of
all things – a mountain biking retreat last August, and a wedding date
was thought to have been set for this Spring. But, by November, those
break-up rumours started to circulate. And, predictably, they were shot
down by Crow, who told the Associated Press:
"When we
were rumoured to have split, and when our publicists called these
magazines to say we haven’t split, the magazines were all so
disappointed because that’s really what’s selling, rooting for a couple
and then they split. That’s what sells the magazine."
It’s an interesting tactic, the ‘deny the problem right before you announce it’ technique, most recently championed by Richie Sambora and Heather Locklear. But, as sure as day follows night, the vague Sheryl Crow/ Lance Armstrong split statement was released, reading:
"After
much thought and consideration we have made a very tough decision to
split up. We ask that everyone respect our privacy during this very
difficult time … We both have a deep love and respect for each other."
The
Sheryl Crow/ Lance Armstrong split does have a very direct impact on
your lives, whatever you may think. Because in six month’s time, you’ll
be buying some bright yellow Lance Armstrong ‘Boo Hoo My Girlfriend
Dumped Me’ wristbands and having your breakfasts spoiled by rubbish sad
Sheryl Crow songs about a lonely man on a bicycle. Mark our words.
Read more:
Crow, Armstrong Call It Splits – E! Online
[story by Stuart Heritage]
MWS says
What does MOR stand for? I’m amiss on that terminology.
Lance Fan says
Crow has had major issues in the past so leave Lance out of it. She has had break ups and personal issues.
The yellow bracelets sre for a reason a**hole! Don’t think it was/is a one time thing. You need help!
Jeanne says
I don’t get why everytime one of these couples split up they have to release a bloody statement. It’s not that interesting,and besides, the public will find out anyway… does anyone really want Sheryl and Lance to stay together? NO! all anyone ever cares about is themselves!!!
James says
MWS, MOR means middle of the road. Suggesting that SC’s music is quite bland. Something that I’m inclined to disagree with, being a bit of a SC fan.
Personally I find Sherly Crow, particularly the Globe Sessions tracks, to be quite uplifting at Brekkie time. Now if you want to start about breakfast spoilers then black pudding is the number one culprit.
kayla says
why does anybody care? it isent our buisness. How would you like somebody prying into your life.
lg says
the minute you start talking about how great of a couple you are…that’s when its over. Star Jones better keep her trap shut.
Dude ranch says
The wristbands are for a reason but still stupid. I see little gangsta wantbees and some real thugs wearing them. It is just a fashion deal to try and be cool and get laid. Doubt half those wearing them have a f%$# clue what they are for. Could probably cure cancer with the money to go to the moon or help those in Iraq that love us so much. Does Armstrong say that? No he is too busy kissing Bush’s a@@. Screw lance armstrong. Just another jerk like most pro-athletes except he had cancer. I don’t see him in front of capital hill demanding funding for research. What I do see is him doing paid television spots for a drug company. I probably do the same thing after seeing the size of the check but there is no way I’d take all this saintly credit crap he gets for not dropping dead.
Jake says
Sorry for the repost. I put in an updated email address fwiw.
Sheryl Crow’s music is actually pretty far from middle of the road. If anything is actually “MOR” these days it’s R&B shit like that zoo animal Usher.
And whoever wrote this article is obviously a serious douchebag (with a closet-gay crush on Lance Armstrong, why else would you say you don’t care and then voice such disdain…wait I know why! you wish he’d cradle you in his lap and let you suckle on his chest).
:O)
# 1 lance fan says
alright…. you guys say how its all pethetic with these ” livestrong bands ” and how everyone is wearing them .. well if you ask me your the ones who are pathetic trying to put down a man who as accomplished so much , who has his own organization and helping to raise money for cancer .. WOW i guess thats a pretty bad guy !!?!?!?!?! … its pretty sad when people like you guys have to post mean comments about someone … when really you should be out trying to get a life!!!
Mare says
For the love of Pete! Sheryl Crow is NOT horrible! The woman is talented and to top that like a sister to me! That would make Lance like a former brother in law! So think again, people! There are those out there who are HURT by those types of comments!
Bitsy Von Bitsy says
Humor. Look it up.
ANDREW MONDICS says
Dear Sheryl,
Heard about the bad news about your breast cancer. I pary for you, love your music, and I hpe you will pull through this. Yo are also a beutiful person and a beutiful girl and I love you and your music. Take care of yourself.
Love, your loyal fan
Andrew Mondics
Sara Prine says
Hope you can work things out after your treatments. You make a great couple.
#2 Lance Fan says
Hey from what I’ve read so far……….#1 Lance Fan is completely right!!!!!!!!!!!!!……………the Livestrong wristbands are very important things in a job to help try to fight Cancer, which is a terrible thing and pretty much affects everyone……….so everybody should stand behind someone that is trying to help a campaign to fight Cancer