So, as you all know, I have a weird preoccupation with Queen Lot Lizard, Bella Thorne. As it turns out, Bella has a new Netflix movie “You Get Me”, which is basically a shitty sexy teen “Fatal Attraction.
So, I thought: What would be more fun than a 30-year-old woman sitting down and drinking a bottle of white wine and reviewing a sexy teen Netflix thriller? Right? Let’s do this.
Ok, first of all, in the first two minutes of the movie there is a yoga scene where the instructor tells everyone to do warrior one and they all do warrior two. I do yoga four times a week and I am not here for this shit.
Fast forward, Bella Thorne looks way better with normal make-up and her ginger hair. I like her so much better when she doesn’t look like a Hot Shop employee reject.
Just realized I meant Hot Topic. Hot Shop is a fish and chips place in the mall in my city.
Oh wow…Bella Thorne really can’t act…
My local cab company won’t deliver cigarettes for debit, only cash. That’s lame, who carries cash anymore?
Ok, so the premise of this movie is a hunky high school jock gets in a fight with his hot, sweet girlfriend at a party, so he goes off and does drugs and fucks Bella Thorne. Now Bella Thorne is a student at their school and she’s not ok with being ignored so she befriends his girlfriend and wants to ruin his life.
Ok, so at the moment I can’t stop thinking about how much better this bitch looks without her lot lizard look on.
Too bad her boob job looks like it was done for $10 in Tijuana.
Ok, so I’m at the point where the main guy tells his best friend he slept with Bella Thorne and he seems like a crazy paranoid person and I can’t find a cigarette.
Anyway, I give this movie 2/5
Chomper says
it’s as good a film as this is a good review.
which is to say that both suck.