99% of the time I love Calvin Klein ads and think they’re really naturally sexy without trying too hard. However, they recently teamed up with the definition of tries way too fucking hard to be sexy: the female spawns of Kris Jenner.
That’s right, Kourtney, Khloe, Kendall and Kylie, plus some chick who looks like an Instagram model who was always getting compared to Kim Kardashian, but obviously isn’t Kim Kardashian, are all featured in a new Calvin Klein campaign. Oh, and Kylie is totes pregnant.
What the fuck is this picture? It’s like the darkest timeline version of The Virgin Suicides.
When I looked through the campaign photos today three things came to mind, but before I get to them, I’ll let you have a look at the pics…
Ok, so now that we’ve feasted our eyes upon this mess, let’s get to my initial reactions:
- What the fuck is this photoshopped mess? Calvin Klein ads are known for being natural looking and effortless. I have literally never seen anything so poorly photoshopped to hell and back. It looks like I photshopped this, and I cannot photoshop for the life of me.
- Kylie Jenner is clearly pregnant. I mean, obviously these pictures were taken a few months ago before Khloe popped and Kim was blonde, but if UsWeekly’s Kylie timeline is correct, then she’s about 8 months pregnant and was probably showing a few months ago, which is evident given that Kylie Jenner loooooves showing off her bod for pics, but here her stomach is covered in every single fucking photo. This campaign might as well be her damn pregnancy announcement (maybe it is?)
- Is that Kim Kardashian? No, seriously, I’m not trying to be funny, is that actually Kim Kardashian or was she super busy this day so they just got someone who looked enough like her? I am genuinely confused.
Clearly the rest of the Kardashian/Jenner sisters need to leave the modeling to ol’ dead-eyed Kendall, because this entire thing is just 50 shades of tragic and I’m beyond shocked that Calvin Klein even released this mess.
Oh, and if you’re wondering if I’m going to log about the SAG Awards, the answer is a hard no. All the same people who won the Golden Globes won and the whole thing was boring af. I’ll blog about the Oscar nominees tomorrow.
The only highlight of the SAG Awards was how precious Millie Bobby Brown looked: