I am gay for Joseph Gordon-Levitt. The guy can do no wrong. He was great as a tiny kid in Third Rock from the Sun, and he’s been great in most of the movies he does nowadays as an accomplished adult actor. He’s not fallen off the wagon, and he’s fairly level-headed – which is more than you can say for a lot of former child actors.
Plus, the guy is able to make fun of himself. Whether it’s singing alongside Zooey Deschanel or – his latest foray into fun – making fun of himself and Channing Tatum’s stripper movie Magic Mike, he throws himself into things with gusto.
In fact, it’s easy to both love and hate Joseph Gordon-Levitt in equal measures. Because he does so many things so well. Take his appearance on Saturday Night Live this past weekend. Gordon-Levitt was game for the faux-stripping sketch making fun of Mad Mike. That’s a good thing. But then he also turns out to have game when it comes to the stripper moves.
Let’s face it: stripping is not the most debonair of practices. What are meant to be sexy, sultry moves are in fact hideous actions. For some reason, the sight of a man getting naked just isn’t appealing to anyone (admittedly, as a straight man I’m a little biased against male strippers, but still…).
But like some suave motherfucker who automatically takes to anything he’s challenged to do, Joseph Gordon-Levitt manages to outstrip the strippers.
It must be difficult to be a multi-talented movie star who can jiggle his crotch in the direction of a television camera and manage to be both funny and attractive to the right kind of people.
Just take a look at the erotic power of the man. He manages to make the girl in the purple blouse so aroused that she collapses to the floor in excitement. And who wouldn’t?! If you have Joseph Gordon-Levitt thrusting his crotch into your arm youwould go into paroxsyms.
Even a version of the worm, the infamously corny dance move, manages to look relatively passable when Hollywood’s own golden boy does it. Then there’s the exploding tickertape/glitter crotch.
Yes, the exploding tickertape/glitter crotch. Confetti agogo.
That’s what I said.
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