It's been a weekend full of festivals with nearly every performer you can think of out to plug any old tat they've got coming out soon. Up in Scotland, a mix of indie, rock and electronica could be found, although annoyances like Bruno Mars still managed to evade security and get on stage at T in the Park, while at Sonisphere, they had angry music fans happy with bands that haven't progressed from early eighties hair metal.
But the pick of the bunch was down at the sick seagull of Britain – Weston-super-Mare – where the family friendly festival T4 On The Beach was happening! While it was broadcast on Channel 4 and hosted by a gang of hipsters who all deserve to be shot, it was the sort of day where parents of small children could drop them off, safe in the knowledge they wouldn't be snorting lines of speed. Last year, one of music?s answers to satire, Jedward, broke an ankle.
This year, JLS threw a slight hissy fit and pulled out of the event. It's almost like the end of the world has just happened. So what pissed off JLS then?
Usually when we hear of bands sticking their fingers up at festival promoters, somebody?s ego has gotten in the way. In the past we've seen stupid tour riders that range from entire rooms being decked out in specific colour schemes to certain food stuffs being shipped in from around the world just to praise some maniacal dweeb.
After losing X-Factor, JLS have remarkably made a career out of singing and haven't gone down the road of so many contestants to go work in a grotty fried chicken shop. So what went wrong at T4 On The Beach? Surely all they need to do is go on stage, lie to the crowd by telling them that they are the best audience in the world and sing, sing, SING!
For once in our meaningless lives, we MIGHT, have to side with JLS. They tweeted the following message:
?its true we ain’t on 2day, UNO we r a live singin act so them not giving us a soundcheck and able to prepare means we can’t go on for this. ‘it’s something that was beyond our control. As a 4 piece live singing band there is no way we can do such a huge show without a soundcheck or camera rehearsal..we are extremely disappointed to let you all down.”
From their dreadful grasp of the English language, we think that they weren't given enough preparation time for a soundcheck and subsequently refused to put on a rubbish performance. Even though we're uber cool here at hecklerspray and listen to music that you won't appreciate until it's used in a milk advert, even we applaud an act that?ll refuse to take to the stage unless some sort of practice has been had. However, we can still call them vain and up their own rumps for not having time to practice for the camera. JLS tweeted further:
‘All of our fans know us and know that when we perform we go 100% and are 100% happy that we can give you the best, there’s no way that we would have done this today.?
We?ll let you work out that last tweet.
But while the tears of many young fans could create a mini tidal-wave over the loss of JLS at the festival, they didn't have to worry. They had other ace acts on hand such as Cher Lloyd, N-Dubz and Scouting For Girls.
Oh.
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Chloe JLS says
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
You are retarded.
JLS really REALLY wanted to perform, they would NEVER, EVER mouth swear words.
you are just making up a fucked up story. First get your facts right.
JLS love their fans so much.
This story is wrong. Go fuck yourselves.
Chloe JLS says
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
JLS really REALLY wanted to perform, they would NEVER, EVER mouth swear words.
you are just making up a story. First get your facts right.
JLS love their fans so much.
This story is wrong in so many ways.
Angela says
“JLS would NEVER, EVER mouth swear words.”
Just like their fans would NEVER, EVER type them.
Euan says
Oh my god is that Chloe from JLS?!
Danielle says
This article isn’t even worthy of being called news.
Matthew Laidlow is obviously going through a mid-life crisis and hates the world!
Society doesn’t need negative and pessimistic people like you to hate everything!
JLS have worked very hard to be where they are and deserve respect for everything that they do for their fans. Matthew on the other hand needs to get a hobby or go out more because being around himself too much has made him into a bitter old man!