Jessica Simpson says her dad didn’t fit her for her first training bra.
Let’s face it, no one ever thought that he did. In fact, we all went about blissfully without ever having thought about it at all. But now that the topic has been broached and your day has been ruined by the mental image, all we can think is “Joe Simpson fit his daughter for a training bra?? Ewwww…” That, and, “We missed a story about Joe Simpson fitting his daughter for a training bra??”
We apologise for missing such an important, vomit-inducing piece of journalism. It shall not happen again. We will be the first to supply you with details when Joe Simpson details accounts of fitting his daughter for her second and third training bras, as well as every subsequent regular bra up to the present.
Joe Simpson has done a nice job of portraying himself as a creepy, pervy dad to his daughter Jessica Simpson. Not so much towards his younger daughter, Ashlee, but more so now that she got plastic surgery and looks less like a grungy swamp-thing and more like his hot daughter, now.
Jessica’s MTV show Newlyweds with her then-husband Nick Lachey showed the world that her dad had an unnatural level of involvement in his daughter’s life, and then there’s the famous interview where Joe discussed his daughter’s endowed DD status. Yeeeeech. Not to mention that he supposedly pushed Jessica and Tony Romo together, and is holding Tony’s entire immediate family hostage in case Tony tries to break up with Jessica again. Just joking!
But, hey. Joe Simpson isn’t as creepy as you think, okay? Cut the guy some slack. Jessica explained in a radio interview with K-FROG 95.1 in Colton, Calif., last week that rumours that go around about her are just plain silly:
"There have been stories that are ridiculous. Like my father really fit me for a training bra. Like, who believes that kind of thing?"
Well, pretty much anyone that’s ever seen your father, heard of him, of smelled his hair pomade and teeth bleaching residue, Jessica.
Sure, you can all deny it, but what about the rumours of Joe Simpson fitting Chris O’Donnell and George Clooney for their Batman fronts pieces, hmmmm? Is anyone denying that? Didn’t think so.
Danni Bryden says
I never even let my dad SEE me in a training bra. I got them all fitted by that nice old man two houses down. He gave me lots of candy, too.