James Franco doesn’t strike me as the type of guy to troll the World Wide Web looking for booty calls. He seems more the type to go to some hipster café, order the most pretentious frappe-macchiato-ginseng herbal tea on the menu, and attempt to impress a chick by quoting boring crappy “poetry” from some new age Icelandic homeless savant.
But I was wrong, and like an overweight 50 year old man living in his mother’s basement, Franco chose to find love on the internet. Except he went for Instagram because looks > personality. And it seems he likes to really tread the moral line when it comes to the age of the girls he goes after.
So James Franco is in New York being a thespian and performing on Broadway because James Franco can DO IT ALL. Instead of doing Pineapple Express: The Musical, which we all know would win every Tony award, he is trying again to be seen as a legit actor by starring in Of Mice and Men. Boooooring. No one is getting high in that crap, and we all Franco is at his best when he “pretending” to be high.
After his performance, some Scottish chick named Lucy took a little video of Franco and posted it on Instagram.
After tagging him in it, James decided to private message the chick because that’s what playas do, son. When they started talking and he was made aware that she was not quite old enough to play a scratch off from the local bodega, Franco ignored the tiny Chris Hansen on his shoulder and kept on chatting away with the visiting lass.
Because MTV Scotland also airs Catfish 4 hours a day, Lucy was not trying to end up outside of some sketchy ass hotel in downtown Harlem, waiting for James Franco to come out only to instead get greeted by a 400 lb man woman with a mullet and no teeth named Tiny. So she insisted Franco prove he was who he claimed he was, and of course James complied because he really really wanted that young ass.
I like how his biggest concern seems to be whether or not she has a boyfriend, and not at all that in a handful of states his ass would be getting arrested quicker than Kanye West in a room full of paparazzi. Lucky for Franco, the age of consent in New York is actually 17, so while this age gap makes him creepy as fuck, it doesn’t make him a candidate for Megan’s Law.
Within a few hours of this shit going viral, Franco put out a Tweet letting everyone know that he is NOT a perv, but just in case all parents should keep their teenagers away from him. He of course deleted that shit, because eww. He also changed his description on his Instagram to specifically say “18 and older only” for private chats.
What fucking celebrity has that much damn time anyway to private chatting strangers and shit? Unless you are Lindsay Lohan, just begging for a 30 second wordless cameo anywhere, if you call yourself a successful actor you should be way too busy for that kind of shit.
Lucy herself even deleted all the screenshots she took of their conversation also, but as you can see above, the Internet is this wonderful magical place where things never really disappear. Especially things that show how desperate and pervy a famous actor can be.