Although in 1995 India was a barren wasteland where nothing had ever lived, by 1996 billions of bums had moved in and turned it into a sort of poverty-themed Disneyland.
Tourists love it – and it’s the perfect setting for that Slum Dog Millionaire movie, don’t you think? You don’t think so? Well you’re not alone – all homeless Indian denigrates agree with you wholeheartedly. Enough so that they’re currently picketing outside the home of one of the film’s stars for a big budget name-change or something.
In the movie Slumdog Millionaire, there’s a scene towards the end where the entire cast gets accidentally axed to death by a blind fireman. He’s later found guilty of something or other, and gets hanged by the neck from the Mayor’s crystal chandelier. It’s a tragedy, really. Not as good of a tragedy as we would write, mind you, but a tragedy just the same. We figure that’s why people like it so much.
The western world has always welcomed cinematic sadness with open arms – think about it. That movie where the girl boxer dies on a stool or something – all countries first-world and up actually changed their constitutions to force every single person to have to watch it, by law, on their 18th birthday. Penalty for not doing so is a class c misdemeanor. It truly was great for ticket sales.
And every single movie Ben Stiller ever made – they’re all incredibly tragic. It’s a different kind of tragic, mind you, but still, they’ve made so much money that some African governments literally had to print more.
We meant ‘almost’ literally.
You know who hates tragic movies though? Poverty-stricken East Indians. They hate ’em. Especially when they’re set in India, and the title of the movie calls their entire financial underclass ‘dogs.’ We’re talking about that insensitive Slumdog Millionaire movie. The natives in India have even been riled enough to stage protests outside the homes of at least one of the film’s actors.
You don’t believe us? Well then, believe the Associated Press:
“Several dozen Mumbai slum residents protested the award-winning film “Slumdog Millionaire” on Thursday, calling the film’s title insulting. The protest came amid mounting excitement in India _ where the movie is set and home to many of its actors _ ahead of Academy Award nominations later Thursday…”I am poor, but don’t call me slumdog,” said Rekha Dhamji, 18, one of about two dozen slum residents who protested outside the home of one of the movie’s actors, Anil Kapoor. “I don’t want to be referred to as a dog,” she said. Other protesters held up banners reading “Poverty For Sale,” and “I am not a dog.” One of them carried a puppy.”
Funny they have such a problem being called dogs when once a year or so they make all their daughters marry one. It’s true – follow the link and see. The lesson learned there is that although dogs do make excellent, caring and attentive spouses, they are still socially several steps below the extremely poor.
This makes those marriages rather tough. Imagine for a second what it would be like to be married to something so wonderful, and yet be forbidden by law from looking it in the eye.
That’s not a life most are willing to lead. Not when you’re madly in love with a cocker spaniel the way we are and always have been since we first saw Foofy in a rich man’s backyard.
We’ll always have Alpo, Foofy, We’ll always have Alpo.
Dallas says
“East Indians” – who says that????
d.
Mumbai says
Boyle has really done a good job with this movie. While the movie deals with the gory details of the underbelly of Mumbai, it doesnt really leave you with a sick feeling. The story feels like a commentary and at the end you just feel good about the whole movie. Very well done I must say.
The music score by Rehman is amazing, the actors who played junior Jamal and Salim were the real stars. They were simply too good.
I thought Freida Pinto was overhyped. I think she had just 15 mins of screen presence in the whole movie.
Indian says
The depiction of slums is not the issue here and we Indians most humbly accept our shortcoming ,infact I enjoyed the movie as a form of creative art ,but the problem starts with the stereotyping of the class conflict …..see anil kapoor taunting jamal on his slum back ground and him being a chai wala and more over the audience guffawing in that ugly way in response….wait a minute ..,can you imagine amitabh bacchan letting go such a volley of abuses .Anil does it not in a typical direct way but in a way which says much more than it appears to naked eyes .I dont think that was in good taste ..that brings out the primitive western instincts ,as the saviors of moral uprightness .a colonial hangover that never lets go..and the stereotyping of indians and more so as the inhabitants of the subcontinent .We dont disagree with the fact that there is class conflict ,but it exists in every civilisation to a certain extent ,thankfully our constitution strictly prohibits such discrimination on a public medium like television.We own up to our poverty ,our poor health services ,our corruption ,our politics.. we are trying to improve things and are increasingly successfull.To sum it up I would quote the director of “Dharavi ” who talks about this BBC documentary being filmed during the course of of filming Dharavi .He was requested to help the BBC crew around dharavi .He says during a shot inside a hut one of the BBC crew comes screaming “stop…..theres a telivision set inside”….A telivision set is out of place in a slum ……..! Somebody said journalism? Infact journalism with a script…This hasnt stopped us getting this far…. we have a long way to go and we assure the west , we will be there ….where no BBC ,danny boyle script can think of ….in no time… !till than ride Tatas jaguar and Rovers ….our day will be when we see these in our countryside ..the common man being able to afford them.. Jai Hind.
Anand says
Well said “Indian”. The only point I would differ everyone has problems. A problem is a perception of a person loking at it. If the whole world lived in slums, would this even be a question? What if 25 years later they started living on Moons? Would that make earth a slum?
My point is that we don’t have to prove anything to anyone, especially West. Indian is a older, more stable, more vibrant and more diverse society that has been around for 8000 years without a break. It will chalk out its own course, its own rules and its own fundamentals. Why try and imitate western stereotype of the first world vision?
Gingerchat says
It is just a movie; watch it, forget it.
Rosa says
It’s not just a movie. Its the only impression that many people get of India. It’s a joke to say that it’s only a movie. Specially for the West, many people don’t receive any education about other cultures other than from television. As such, it’s important to avoid stereotypes and blatant lies about an entire culture. I am not Indian but I know the film inaccurately portrayed Indian culture.
Slamdog says
Dallas Says:
January 23rd, 2009 at 3:44 pm
Shilpa says
Cannot believe how insensitive this article. The link about dog marriages was uncalled for, and makes one wonder if this whole article was just an excuse to poke fun at Indian customs. And the references to Indians are archaic and deliberately loaded with Empire-era connotations. The “natives of India?” As if “East Indians” wasn’t archaic enough (there is really only one definition of ‘Indian’ – people from the Indian subcontinent. West Indians, American Indians – these are not ‘Indians’), deliberately using the word “natives” to describe poor, working-class Indian people and then poke fun at their supposed ignorance and supposedly backward customs is extremely disrespectful and appalling. The new racism of your writers is disgusting. Grow the fuck up, Hecklerspray.
buggerrred says
what a crap review,unfunny toss.