The world has been awaiting the name of Halle Berry's newborn baby daughter for quite some time now.
As far as we're aware, this is because the world has been waiting to replace 'Stupid Berry Baby' with a real name in its special Infants It's OK To Dislike Because They're Already More Beautiful Than You notebook.
But anyway, the wait is over. Halle Berry has finally decided to reveal that her baby will be known as Nahla Ariela Aubry, and we can assume that Halle Berry settled on Nahla Ariela Aubry either because it's the name of an obscure mountain range from Lord Of The Rings or because it's an anagram of Labara Urinal Yeah.
Lots of people think Halle Berry is a bit dim just because she's pretty and thought that Perfect Strangers was an acceptable post-Oscar movie to make, but we're starting to think that actually Halle Berry is kind of a genius. You were probably under the impression that Halle Berry refused to initially reveal the name of her newborn daughter to protect her from the glare of the media, if only for a day.
Not a chance – in fact, Halle Berry was just chasing the headlines. Look at it this way – "Here's my baby, her name's Sarah," is just one story. But thanks to Halle Berry's clever little tactic she's got the 'Halle Berry has a baby' story and the 'Halle Berry names her baby' story, with a 'this is what Halle Berry's boyfriend's sister thinks of the baby' story thrown in as a kind of bonus. Genius.
So, anyway, Halle Berry has named her baby – and she certainly had a lot to live up to. After all, you can't give your baby a normal name because then nobody will know that their mother is famous – and Shiloh Nouvel and Suri and Bluebell Madonna have raised the bar for made-up names to an impossible degree. So what did Halle Berry do to name her baby?
By the look of it, she dropped a mug of tea onto her laptop keyboard and called it whatever came up on her screen. It's a good system, which is why we plan to call our first-born Uyyv6v8 Cdl;. Access Hollywood reports:
It's official, Halle Berry's baby daughter's name is: Nahla Ariela Aubry. The name is pronounced ["GNAW-lah ARE-ee-EL-uh"]. Halle spoke directly with Access Hollywood's Nancy O'Dell about choosing the name. "We didn't have a name picked out until just before we left the hospital," Halle told Nancy. "For us it was hard to name the most important person in our life until we met her."
You know, it's wrong of us to judge Halle Berry for calling her daughter Nahla Ariela Aubry – or, as we like to call her, GNAW-lah ARE-ee-EL-uh – because it's Halle Berry's right as a mother and a human being to call her child whatever she sees fit without outside criticism. So this will be the last time we pass judgement on Nahla Ariela Aubry.
Also, we hear that if you say her name three times into a mirror at midnight, a witch leaps out and eats your skin. We don't want that to happen, either.
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baby names says
I like the name Nahla, its unique and beautiful name.
BerryColor says
“GNAW-lah”
What the hell is that freaky pronunciation?? o_O
Nahla is an Arabic name and it is simply pronounced as it is read!
I’m an Arab myself….I guess I know better >_>