Recently, Gwyneth Paltrow took to Instagram to post a Throwback Thursday pic from 1992 with her ex-boyfriend, Donavan Leitch. She was 19, not famous, and, dare I say, looked pretty cool (yes, I think people look cool when they smoke. I’m such a nerd). Then I thought: Man, remember back when Gwyneth Paltrow was really fucking cool?
It was a glorious time called the 1990s and everyone from Johnny Depp to Leonardo DiCaprio to Madonna was exponentially cooler. EVEN Gwyneth Paltrow. In fact, she was kind of a big deal in the world of cool. Of course, this was before she was the pretentious, kale-loving cunt we all know and hate today.
For those of you who were babies, toddlers, or still watching Barney in the 1990s, let me just tell you, Gwyneth Paltrow used to be EVERYTHING. Like she was a 1990s Queen, and until she posted that #tbt picture I totally forgot how awesome she used to be!
Here she is with other 90’s Goddesses, Kate Moss and Liv Tyler:
Here she is SLAYING in one of her best movies, “Great Expectations”:
Here she is being #flawless with Brad Pitt at his hottest, yet she’s so cool she couldn’t give less of a fuck:
Here she is like “Just won an Oscar, looking perfect, no big deal”:
So even though she basically totally sucks now, let’s remember back to a way better time, when the world was a simpler place, the music was better, and Gwyneth Paltrow wasn’t a total bitch who had a website called Goop that spewed a lot of dumb, privileged white girl shit. Back when people actually said things like “She’s NOT prettier than Gwyneth!”
That’s right, Gwyneth Paltrow, there was a point in time when you were actually really cool and thanks to your recent #tbt I actually remember it. You still suck now, though.
Rentalic says
Thanks for sharing this and i am a fan of her.
Roy says
She is not cool, was not cool, and will never be cool. Anyone can look cool on occasion. When she speaks, it’s always silly dumb ass time.