Usually a story about a lesbian three-way would excite every single slightly grubby man in the world, but not this one – it's a story about a lesbian in a three-way car crash. But you can always dream can't you, you filthy pervert.

At the weekend, Ellen DeGeneres managed to find herself caught in the middle of a three-car crash in Los Angeles that was suspected to have been caused by a drink-driver. However, Ellen DeGeneres escaped from the car crash with only very slight injuries, which is good news for her but still doesn't cover up the fact that her 1990s sitcom wasn't very good.

Lately we've been treated to a rare streak of spectacular Los Angeles car crashes. First of all, the least famous Baldwin brother ploughed into a parked car so hard that it leapt 20 feet, and then the kid from The Sixth Sense apparently got loaded up on booze and dope and flipped his car over a concrete block. And now Ellen DeGeneres is at it too!

You remember Ellen DeGeneres; she had that sitcom that wasn't very good, then she announced that she was a lesbian and left the show in order to make Sheryl Crow exploit her personal life on daytime TV. Well, she was in a crash crash at the weekend. OK, maybe not a big car crash, but a car crash nonetheless. OK, so it wasn't really a car crash at all, more like a little tiny non-threatening shunt when two other cars banged into her car a bit. But you're reading about it right now, so it must be news.

According to reports, Ellen DeGeneres was stopped at traffic lights on Sunset Boulevard when a car hit the car behind her, which then bumped into her car. After the accident, a 52-year-old woman was arrested on suspicion of drink driving, and, as Sgt Ken Buscarino of the LAPD explains:

"Ms DeGeneres had a little neck and back pain, but it doesn't look like anything serious."

Celebrity lesbian watchers, while pleased that Ellen DeGeneres walked away from the crash relatively unscathed, are thought to be disappointed that Rosie O'Donnell wasn't involved in the car crash, and that the car didn't hit her just a little bit harder.

Read more:

DeGeneres Escapes From Car Crash – BBC

[story by Stuart Heritage]