If you're unemployed, a student or a drug addict, leaving the four walls of your house isn't something that high on your list.
Think about it, whilst millions of poor saps go to work to earn money, you get to lie in bed while scratching your arse and reheating last night?s kebab for breakfast.
The only problem is that things can get boring. Take E4, for example – in the daytime it shows Friends. And nothing else. But if you are sick of seeing the same episode for the millionth time, there is hope for you. Rumours circulating around Hollywood are suggesting a Friends movie. We've haven't been this excited since the announcement of The Sex and the City film. Honest.
Let's be honest, the only people that have benefited from Friends are The Rembrandts. Does anyone know any other song of theirs apart from I'll Be There For You? Of course not. Remember kids, every time the overly jazzy guitar chords lurch from the TV to our ears, they get paid. Whilst you're reading this, they?ll probably be surrounded by piles of money while prostitutes make them crazy sandwiches such as paprika and diesel oil.
Anyway, what would an extended version of Friends bring to the big screen? Obviously you'd be about ?6 lighter off after buying a ticket. Next, you\’ll pick up annoying American words and catchphrases that pretty much makes you a walking punchbag if you recite them. We imagine the plot of the film to go along the lines of this:
?It's Thanksgiving in America and all the Friends have reunited for a special one off meal to celebrate freedom and memories from days gone by. Before arriving, Phoebe hasn't defrosted the turkey! Whoops! She puts it on a shelf to unfreeze. But uh-oh! The shelf is wonky. Only the slightest nudge would knock it off and on top of someone. Cue someone dopey like Chandler to enter the flat, tap the shelf and send the turkey on to his head! Thus, making way for 91 minutes of repetitive comedy. Some of which that will be stolen from the TV show.?
One of the minor stars of the TV show, James Michael Tyler, told Now Magazine:
?Friends: The Movie is definitely on. I still keep in touch with a lot of the cast and they say that they are really keen.?
However, none of the six recognised people who make the show have confirmed anything. Whilst most of them have done bugger all since the show finished, we guess they?ll be haggling over money before agreeing to do an utterly gash film.
None of them will have learnt from The Sex and the City film. TV to film really doesn't work.
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Mike Dirooky says
“That’s Just The Way It Is Baby” was a pretty big hit for the Rembrandts. Pretty…pretty…big.
hoohaahee says
Dear God..
This is going to be, in a word, Shite.
JoeMomma says
I have convulsions just flipping past that show. You guys might think I’m nuts but I think Friends has some crazy mesmorizing subliminal message beaming through it. How else can you explain a so many people watching this utter crap! I know David Ike is a nut, but he might be right about this one…