No matter what Dancing On Ice does in the future – even it somehow finds a cure for Piers Morgan – it will always be remembered for Todd Carty wobbling about on the rink like a drunk trying to stand up on a lilo in a pool.
Maybe that’s because the celebrities hired for the show are so eye-poppingly poor that no-one ever really manges to recall a full memory of the show… and the new series looks like it’ll be no different.
That’s because Vanilla Ice and Calum Best are being lined up to take part in the Strictly Come Ice Skating show, as well as a whole other bunch of no marks.
Of course, this isn’t the first time either of these slebs have appeared on reality/format TV. Vanilla Ice is no longer famous in our collective heads as being the man who rapped “Ice ice baby”. That’s in part, thanks to the Halifax now claiming it as their own, prompting people to clench their fists so hard their knuckles go white and their finger nails drop-off.
No, Vanilla Ice (real name: Something really amusing) is only famous for his appearance on The Farm where he hilariously got his arse handed to him by an irate Paul Daniels who shouted at him ’til his ears evaporated.
Best, of course, is famous for sticking his penis into various women despite being of No Fixed Talent. He, of course, appeared in Celebrity Love Island, bearing witness to Paul Danan’s staggering and numerous nervous breakdowns, which in a way, we really should applaud him for.
The other rumoured participants on the show are equally grim.
There’s been mutterings that Kerry Katona, Jonathan Wilkes and Tim Westwood have been lined up to skid around an ice rink on their ears. If these all transpire to be true, then by God, there’s a chance that this could be the worst/best programme ever aired.
Just think of it. Westwood and Vanilla Ice talking each other up before breaking numerous bones live on our television sets.
Wonderful.
Inder sign says
What up ice