Oh Christina, what have you done? We thought you'd change your supposed dirty ways that warped our mind a little bit.
Christina Aguilera is now the sort of person that the mature music listener might admit to liking – her image is now less slag and more sophisticated. Gone are the jockstraps, dildos and other bondage clothing. Instead she looks well groomed, less sweaty and more like the sort of girl who wouldn't fight you after downing a skipload of booze.
But going to shows where men do all sorts of weird tricks to their cocks? It sounds like the old demonic and filthy Christina is back to haunt us all.
OK, we might have lied a little bit. Christina Aguilera didn't go to some sort of sordid den where men whip out their cheesy penises and do such amazing tricks like making it bigger, making it smaller and making it cry a white liquid. Nor did she take part in any sort of olde worlde cock fighting competition where she won a wedge of gold against a pirate who was sailing around the world from Spain to hunt for new types of vegetables.
What a girl wants is beyond us. So far we've tried spitting butterflies at them, lining out their names in crackers in the street and publically announcing our love via the tannoy system on trains. But hey, if girls really like seeing men fidgeting with their long sticks, then maybe that's we should do. After all, what could go wrong? At best, a possible public arrest, shaming and exposure in the local newspaper. Now Magazine reports:
?The singer went to see the Puppetry Of The Penis show at the Coast Playhouse in West Hollywood. Christina, 29, even posed for a picture with the naked stars after their performance?.
A few of those details scare us slightly. From our past experiences with puppets, they are fun lifeless things unless someone shoves their hands inside them and makes them work. Then they do all sorts of comedy dances, handclaps and interactions with the crowd. Do we honestly want to know what the penis puppetry did there? No, not really.
But in theory, it seems like a good idea. If girls are attracted to the sight of some blokes pretty much snapping their cocks in various positions, maybe we can join in too and show off our talent for the entire world to see.
Though we probably wouldn't be welcome in nursing homes or schools. Not at first anyway.
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chrissy says
http://tinyurl.com/xtinaaguilera
Check out this page which features her new single you can listen to as well as hot photos and videos! I love her and am so excited for her new sound and music!!
Gilbert Wham says
Astro-Turf, drive-by-download malware site, or genuinely obsessive fan? Has anyone cared enough to click that very suspicious-looking link?