Today was meant to be kind of special. Today was meant to be the dramatic first Celebrity Big Brother eviction, but with novelty rockers and mental old directors walking freely out of the Celebrity Big Brother house, it'll be a bit of a letdown.
But at least it's something – the Celebrity Big Brother housemates have been getting on nauseatingly well again at the moment. So now we know that the first Celebrity Big Brother evictee is going to get the boot later today, who's it going to be? You know that you've only got a few hours left to place a bet on the first Celebrity Big Brother eviction, don't you – and the betting odds are still surprisingly long. You may as well try and make some money from Celebrity Big Brother; think of it as payment for Celebrity Big Brother stealing your entire life for a month.
So here are the Celebrity Big Brother betting odds for tonight's eviction – for Jade Goody, Shilpa Shetty, Jermaine Jackson, Jackiey Budden and Jack Tweed, with help from Paddy Power…
Jade Goody – You know how we said the other day that they years between Big Brother and Celebrity Big Brother had knocked some intelligence into Jade Goody? Yeah, we'd like to take that back please. Watching Jade have an argument with Ken Russell on Sunday was like watching a monkey try and work a tin-opener. The crux of her argument seemed to be that Big Brother would physically starve the servants for an entire week if Ken so much as ate a cream cracker. And don't get us started on how smug Jade is that she's been on the cover of Bella a few times… having said that, Jade seems to be the only thread that's stopping Jackiey from demolishing the Celebrity Big Brother house then farting on it and calling it a dickhead, so maybe that's why she's least favourite to be evicted from Celebrity Big Brother tonight. Current Celebrity Big Brother betting odds – 25/1
Shilpa Shetty – We get the feeling that Shilpa Shetty has got where she is in Bollywood not through talent or hard work, but by giggling like a schoolgirl and cocking her head adorably when she's around men, because the more she does that, the more the Celebrity Big Brother men fall for her. The Celebrity Big Brother women, though, are a fearsome bunch, and they've got Shilpa's card marked. It might be because Shilpa is Indian, it might be because she's prettier or more successful than them, or it might just be that she doesn't drink so she can't cackle like a witch on crystal meth like the other female Celebrity Big Brother do after half a glass of Babysham. When evictions come round properly, we're sure that Shilpa will cop a load, but for tonight we think that she'll be safe. Current Celebrity Big Brother betting odds – 22/1
Jermaine Jackson – Usually you come to expect that on a show like Celebrity Big Brother, the housemates know that the quieter contestants usually last longer than the extroverts, and that any silence is a tactic. However, when it comes to Jermaine Jackson, we think it might because a thought only floats into his brain every seven or eight hours, and 97% of those thoughts are "Jackiey? Is that your ass making that smell?" On the other hand, Jermaine Jackson has spent his time in the Celebrity Big Brother house being impeccably polite to everyone, and that must be winning people over. However, manners are what you'd expect from Jermaine – 35 years of explaining that, no, actually it's Michael that does the Moonwalk will do that to a man. Current Celebrity Big Brother betting odds – 16/1
Jackiey Budden – To say that Jackiey has made an impression on the Celebrity Big Brother house would be a massive understatement – here is a woman that literally can't talk to another person without calling them a "mackerel" or a "dickhead" somewhere along the line, a woman who boasts that she used to pretend to be a prostitute in order to rob people and – crucially – one of the only people on Earth who makes Jade Goody look anywhere near borderline sympathetic. It's looking as if Jackiey Budden stands a fair chance of being evicted from Celebrity Big Brother tonight – let's hope that doesn't happen, purely because she's making Leo Sayer suicidal. Just don't let her bloody win, that's all we ask. Current Celebrity Big Brother betting odds – 5/2
Jack Tweed – If our earlier theory about the quieter housemates staying in Celebrity Big Brother for longer is true, then we'd expect Jack Tweed to stay in the Celebrity Big Brother house until the Sun expands and swallows the Earth. We're actually beginning to suspect that Jack Tweed communicates with people telepathically, because he's literally said about three words since he set foot in the Celebrity Big Brother. For pure uselessness alone, Jack Tweed should be the one that's evicted from Celebrity Big Brother tonight. But then again, perhaps that what he wants – wasn't he found naked in some other girl's bed once? Current Celebrity Big Brother betting odds – 1/3
Tomorrow – it's back to the betting odds to win Celebrity Big Brother, unless something incredible happens. But if that's too long to wait – or you feel like making more money than you know what to do with – head right over to the Paddy Power Celebrity Big Brother betting odds page to see the latest, and best, betting odds.
Jackiey's Number One fan says
Jack to go, without a doubt. Jackiey’s an idiot too, but it’s common sense to evict the quiet idiots before the loud idiots isn’t it. Like you said, Jack’s hardly likely to send Leo Sayer plummeting towards a nervous breakdown, but Jackiey might
Jessica says
Jack tweed goota wiv he gajussssss!!!!!!
Vip says
Can somebody please turn down the volume on that minging council estate trashy excuse of a woman-Jade Goody. It is one thing to be stupid and another to be so narcissistic and ignorant. Yes I am complaining about the way Shipa has been treated by her. I guess in this case opposites repel. Shilpa is a gorgeous, gentle, elegant, caring beautiful woman, who does not need to continuously have her energy sucked by a minger like Jade. As for danielle, there is something you can learn from Shilpa, shes ten times more beautiful then you and shes never had to get her tits out to prove it. In fact she must have a very low level of esteem to take Jades behaviour as an influence on how she should behave. As for all you twats that signed up to be Jades PA and furthermore you money mongers who then gave a show. For heavens sake no. What is going on in our country, that we put pathetic women like Jade on a pedestal. Yep a great role model for our fellow populated brothers and sisters. Come on, sort it, otherwise you never know a messiah will turn up. To kick ass!
s summers says
i think this racist thing with shilpa is total b..\s..t if the same had of been said between say jade and another white person
i think it would of been seen as a joke
i mean come on just because curry has been slated as a national dish really its pathetic not racist
if i went down my local curry house and got the shits so to speak as the curry be too spicy i would goin nxt time tell the lads whom i know (hey guys your curry gave me the shits ease up on the spice yeah )
they would have a laugh with me calling me a stupid gura (white) with no taste i know these lads they know me slating food is noway racist
i think shilpa may be big in other countries but as she is a second rate actress to others in the uk i think the publicity wont do her any harm will it
seems to me like its another load of rubbish been taken out of context big brother has hosted alot of shows im not a avid watcher but never have i heard such a load of crap in my life
why cant ppl live and let live if some had there way i think the english language would be the second language in the uk
again i think its disgusting shilpa cries over anything anyway and if she is so wrapped in cotton wool she should never agreed to go into the house pathetic cow
Anon says
Right im not being funny but when you think abwt it jade has done the best out of every non celeb thats been on big borhter…i think when she has some make up on and does her self up she can look nice but she needs to sort dat terrible voice out…..jo is just a prat she dont no what shes talkin abwat she a bankrupt bitch….
STEVIE says
I loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee jack he is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo SEXYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY jade is a very lucky women dont ever let him go jade coz i wouldnt jack should have won bb he was the best male in the house loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ya loads jack xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx