Amy Winehouse’s Mental Hospital Spaz Out Blamed On Ecstasy
Then buzz it up
July 31st, 2008 at 14:00 by Matthew Laidlow
Yesterday brought the news that Amy Winehouse had decided to take a stroll to the hospital.
It wasn’t because she finally realised she was slowly destroying her insides, it was simply down to having a crazy reaction to the medication slowly digesting in her stomach.
Many people have placed bets on her dying before the end of the year due to her body slowly fading away and her apparent ability to always be pictured with a ciggie and a can of Superbrew.
Yesterday saw a couple of people prematurely attempting to cash in that betting slip, but they were wrong to do so - those good people at the NHS managed to fix her up with some sticky tape and drinks straws.
It’s now surfaced that she’s returned to hospital and her ever-suffering father Mitch has told us what caused her freakout. It was indeed an issue with drugs, but not the good kind. Oh no!
Mitch claims that Amy’s drink had been spiked with ecstasy, causing the young crooner to react violently. It has to be said, hecklerspray loves hearing that excuse from pretty much every person who is sick after a weekends drinking (why do you think Stu is off?). Of course the seventeen pints of lager and no food didn’t make you sick. It was a little white tablet that made you look the village idiot. Again.
But did an ecstasy tablet really cause Amy Winehouse to go in to relapse and bring her a bit closer to death? We all have to remember that she eats drugs like Smarties and drinks heroin like Ribena, so surely this wouldn’t have bothered her? If anything, her body was rejecting the drug because it wasn’t up to the usual standard of getting her wasted and reducing her to walking around in her pants.
Normally when Winehouse does get off her tits on pills, crack, heroin or anything else she can wrap her lips around, she starts screeching for dear hubby Blake. It will probably turn out that this time her harpyish screams have been curbed by Blake appearing in her dreams, telling her to battle on. Or something like that. She’s sure to make up some crap, so long as it isn’t straightforward or normal.
A source told the pack of journalists permanently outside Amy Winehouse’s (wine)house:
“Mitch is furious. He’s certain someone put E in Amy’s drink - and he’s determined to get to the bottom of it. He is convinced that one of her hangers-on was responsible and he’s waiting for a toxicology report to show what caused her to have a fit.â€
This is just another story in the long line of drug related problems for Winehouse. For her it’s just becoming more like real life, and if anything we want to see another celebrity from the world of music flip out like a crazy fool on drugs. Remember the moon face man from Keane? He tripped off his man tits on the old white powder, apparently, but still managed to remain totally dull.
We hope Dougie from McFly is a secret glue sniffer, or at least a fan of poppers. He’s in a band, so they must have done something extreme apart from give their album away in the Sunday Mail. Or is that classed as hard for them?
Related and recent:
- Amy Winehouse Wants to Solve Your Problems on the Radio
- Amy Winehouse’s Brain All Effed Up On The Drugs: Claim
- Amy Winehouse: Why Drug Overdoses Aren’t Especially Hilarious
- Let’s All Guess What Amy Winehouse Is In Hospital For Now
- Amy Winehouse in Hospital Due to Medication Flipping Out Inside Her Guts
- Amy Winehouse Has Another Crack At Rehab
- Amy Winehouse Faints But Is Still Extremely Alive
- Amy Winehouse Not Actually That Emphysema-y, It Turns Out
July 31st, 2008 at 5:00 pm
Sadly for Amy this excuse rings hollow for this one very simple reason. No-one who actually likes, or takes, drugs ever gets spiked. Even by their closest friends or dippiest hangers-on. Those who spike drinks are not wont to do so to anyone who may enjoy the experience, or appreciate the ‘gift that keeps on giving (horrifying flashbacks)’ in any way at all. This is too much like giving it away free to any potential spiker, who will only do so if it results in the entertaining spectacle of a stranger stumbling around in her bra and pants in an erratic manner; and Amy can do that without any assistance at all, chemical or otherwise.
Tomothy Leary and Howard Marks could both have worn “Spike me sideways” t-shirts for the entirety of their adult lives, only to be told to ‘pay for your own buzz, you cheap git’. Likewise with Amy. Her dad needs to wise up and stop believing that she smells of smoke ’cause all her mates were smoking…honest Dad…and I was just looking after those twenty Benson for a mate’. That didn’t work for me when I was fourteen, so why should Crackhouse get away with it?
July 31st, 2008 at 8:17 pm
well firstly i love amy. i am listening to her now. well i think she is really trying her best to get off drugs as is her husband, but she cant just stop ovenight now can she. ive never taken drugs but i bet they r 10000 times harder to give up than fags. just imagine that cos im a smoker myself and its very very hard. so i just want to wish amy the best and keep up the hard work xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx sammy x
August 1st, 2008 at 8:22 am
Sammy, the following characters are missing from your message:
, , , ‘ r , ? ‘ a e ‘ ‘ ‘ , , !
You also missed the Shift key many times, but I don’t know how to display that.
(Dammit, this could get to be a habit. Young people these days!)
August 2nd, 2008 at 4:07 am
“You wouldn’t spike me; you’re too mean. Besides, there’s nothing invented I couldn’t take”…
August 2nd, 2008 at 10:44 am
what in the holy hell was the point in bringing dougie poynter into that
HES DONE JACK SHIT WRONG
IMMA HIT THAT PERSON WHO WROTE THAT
WHATS THE POINT IN THAT
DOUGIE WAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT
FFS
August 2nd, 2008 at 7:17 pm
[...] O Dougie foi também mencionado num artigo sobre a Amy Winehouse: Esperamos que o Dougie dos McFly secretamente cheire cola, ou pelo menos que seja um fã de poppers. Ele está numa banda, por isso eles devem ter feito algo muito aparte de dar o álbum com o Sunday Mail. Ou isso é classificado difÃcil para eles? {lê o artigo inteiro} [...]
August 3rd, 2008 at 5:44 am
I had to look up this “Dougie” person to find out who he is and I think I can now safely say: he deserves pretty much whatever he gets by virtue of being in McFly. Really, renny, what were you thinking?
August 4th, 2008 at 9:03 am
Careful, Gir, or heesa hit you. Then yousa be sorry.
It’s Jack Shit I feel sorry for.
August 4th, 2008 at 2:17 pm
BILL STICKERS WILL BE PROSECUTED
August 8th, 2008 at 3:30 pm
[...] to her father Mitch to tell the media all about it. Was it heroin, lighter fuel, crack or some twat spiking her with ecstasy that caused this latest set back or trip to the [...]
August 9th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
I don’t understand the point in mentioning Dougie Poynter in that article. You just have a problem that there actually are normal musicians who don’t have problems with drugs or alcohol. He is perfect and all you jealous haters just back off cos he’s the best!!!
August 18th, 2008 at 5:44 pm
glue sniffer? haha ¬¬ he is perfect.
August 21st, 2008 at 2:03 pm
LOL. Dougie Poynter doesn’t need drugs to go into a mental hospital. He’s mental as it is and I love him for it. Haha. I feel a war of McFly fans coming to have a go at this writer coming.
I’m with Team McFly.
haha
x
August 21st, 2008 at 2:10 pm
By the way, can someone PLEASE tell me what McFly have done so terribly wrong? All they’ve done it got fourteen top ten singles, seven of which reached #1, have got amazing fans from all over the world, the youngest band ever to have an album debut at #1, every album they’ve realised has gone into the top ten, I mean come on, it’s not like they’ve not even got into the Top 100 once.
I think 50 Cent or some person that calls themself a “music” artist when all they do is talk to a beat should deserve something here.