Misogynist monotone mumbler 50 Cent has re-cast himself as some sort of rubbish movie mogul and has announced his intention to launch ‘Our Cheryl TM’ as a star of the silver screen, what with his own massive success in that area and that.

One of the most recent of the rappers acting credits has been as Cutis Jackson in video game Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2, so we know how he rolls.

With a complete lack of self-awareness, the artist we will never refer to as ‘Fiddy’ has stated that “I am not talking about cameos in laughable movies. I am talking about proper, serious movie roles.”

Because he can make that happen, what with him having appeared in Righteous Kill at the same time as Robert De Niro for about ten seconds.

“I am going to set up a dinner in Robert’s restaurant in New York between the three of us and we can talk,” he told the Daily Star. And that is one dinner we would all like to see.

Robert De Niro was today unavailable to confirm or deny his dinner plans.

Cole, as we’ve already mentioned, is managing to avoid ‘cameo roles in laughable movies’ and is soon to appear in The Beano as side-kick to Minnie the Minx. Please note – this is not poor satire, it is tragic fact.

50 Cent’s next ‘proper, serious movie’ is currently in pre-production and is entitled The Ski Mask Way as noted on IMDb. Again, we’re not making this up.

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