There are a number of things you could ask Curtis '50 Cent' Jackson for advice on.

How to endlessly babble on about that time you got shot, for instance. Or how to sell yourself to as many branding opportunities as possible, to the extent where every slightly dim teenager in the world is decked out in a pair of Fiddy-approved trainers and sipping on a can of Official 'Keeping It Real' Misogyny-Flavour Pepsi.

You wouldn't, however, go asking him any questions about the production of music. Unless, that is, you wanted your new album to sound like his: roughly the same as a slowed-down Geoff Boycott mumbling about bitches over a Casio keyboard 'polka' setting.

It seems like no-one told Lindsay Lohan this.

If proof was needed that the troubled starlet hasn't been in the right frame of mind recently, it's that she's apparently approached 50 Cent and asked him to help her out with her recording career. Following the success of her first two albums Speak and A Little More Personal (nope, us neither), Lindsay has decided that the way forward is to follow the lead of an 'artist' so mediocre he should change his name to 'Halfords Employee'.

According to Lohan's father Michael:

"They're talking about working together. Nothing's firm yet, but they're in talks. They've actually known each other for a while, just from being in the business together and crossing paths at events."

God only knows what the conversation will be like in the studio. Maybe it'll be the sort of no-holds-barred scintillating discourse that'll produce a musical work fit to define a generation. Or – possibly – it'll involve 50 sitting in a gold-plated 'bling chair' occasionally shouting 'yeah' in a vague attempt to keep in time with a beat only he can hear, while Lindsay takes endless swigs from bottles of Lambrini and struggles to come up with lyrics that aren't about drink-driving or making rubbish films.

Get Phil Spector in to produce it, and you've got a winner.

Read More:

50 Cent To Help Resurrect Lindsay's Music Career? – Entertainmentwise