When parents want to know the sexuality of their young sons, there are a few tried and tested methods of determining their outcome.
In the old days, ma and pa simply offered little Johnny the choice of a manly action man or a soppy doll to fiddle with. If the little tyke picked the girl’s toy, he was easily cured via a couple of brisk clips around the head. This was repeated until the boy’s toy was selected, or brain damage kicked in.
But nowadays, a simpler method has emerged for parents, via the worst sport in the history of man – WWE Wrestling. It isn't so much a sport, but a comedy pantomime where fat sweaty Americans comically pretend to hurt each other in tight lycra. An image to make your brain do a vomit. However, the the punches recently got real between aging star Ric Flair and his wife. However, she was the one delivering the pain.
On average, a wrestling match will see a stupidly-named wrestler such as The Pie Monger take on the undisputed champion of the world Marmafunk. If the names aren't daft enough, then the matches will top up your stupidity quota. Things can range from special ladder-climbing matches to special 30-second flower-arranging sessions held over a bed of fire.
Now we don't know what happened between Ric Flair and his wife Jacqueline Beems but it looks like he came out worse. But is this really a surprise? Well not really when you look at the facts. Wrestlers are just actors who look like they have a lot of steroids pumped into them and are generally about as harmful as group of balloons. Jacqueline Beems, however, could quite easily be the sort of person who’d stay at home and deliberately injure herself to build up her pain threshold. Digitalspy reports:
?Flair suffered a cut to his forehead and needed stitches. Beems was arrested for domestic abuse.?
Surely RIc Flaire could have retaliated by bodyslamming his wife through the seventh floor of their tacky mansion. Or maybe he couldn’t, because there wasn’t a script lying around telling him what to do.. Just be thankful he didn't do a Chris Benoit and butcher his entire family. Perhaps he took the line ‘fight them to the death’ a little bit too seriously.
If wrestlers are going to drop like flies due to a feeble excuse like being beaten up of a girl, then we?ll step in to show them who’s boss. Just give us some colourful leggings, a cape and six tins of Stella so we can get tanked up to deliver the fury.
Grr.
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Andrew Kramer says
Your the biggest turd I have ever seen. Your writing sucks and worse than that its insulting to people who have actually accomplished things in their lives and not a tool blogger that hides behind a keyboard.
John Evans says
What would your headline been if he had as much as pushed her away? It sounds like he did the right thing by not doing anything and the letting the police handle the situation.
Nathan says
You’re biggest dunce , @sshole in the world. all the words you have written about wwe are not truth. You writing sucks , You’re a biggest s hole in the world. Did you know When u were writing this article i was fking ur mom. Do not write these kinds of article again . You need to be fired .
hoohaahee says
@nathan
You do realise that everything this article says about WWE is actually the truth? It’s a ridiculous put on show for cheering, low IQ fuckwits.
But then, the sheer number of grammatical errors in your short post leads us to believe that you probably don’t…
Also, espousing such anger at SIX IN THE MORNING (according to the time of your post) indicates your current employment situation is as tenuous as the standard “plot” in the overblown nonsense that passes for wrestling in your country.
irishpat420 says
You are a GOOF,your writing is pathetic your attitude is even sadder.Domestic violence is not something to be made light of don’t believe me ask Phil Hartman…oh that’s right you cant …he was shot to death by his wife!!! YOU ARE A GOOF.
irishpat420 says
There was some truth in your article…where?
First Flair does not work for the WWE he in fact works for a company called TNA.
Second he did not receive stitches,in fact he refused treatment.
You also failed to mentioned that it was his wife’s daughter who was the one who called the police due to her mothers actions her 911 call is available on line to anyone who wanted to write an accurate story.
Before you respond with a pathetic comment allow me to assure you that i am no fan of pro wrestling.Unlike you i do not support domestic violence[beating a child to except a life choice]nor make fun at the seriousness of such a crime.
You have to opportunity and the forum to do something positive and instead you use that opportunity to promote domestic violence.One can not help but wonder what kind of abusive family you came from and what type of abusive home you now occupy.
I fill sorry for you,i have pity for your kind and i hope that one day you receive the physiatric help you need.
jerry spence says
Im an accomplished graduate student turned into a self made millionare. I grew up on the NWA of the 80’s that featured this man as its centerpiece strutting and performing and doing his thing that he did so well. I think your a jerk-off moron that will never amount to anything.
wwe75 says
you are a moron,ric flair did the right thing buy not fighting back and calling the police,if he wanted to he could kill his wife instantly. people like you dont understand pro wrestling,just because it scripted doesnt mean everything about it is fake.the pain that these wrestlers body go through is all to real.ric flair was a high school state wrestling champion,good football player and he powerlifted with ken patera.many wrestling moves can be used in self defense when done for real.every wrestler on wwe roster would kick your candyass,if you dont think im right go to a good pro wrestling school,you would cry like the baby you are.i have done amateur wrestling,karate and shootfighting/mma,i have nothing but respect for these guys who put there bodies in pain everynight just to entertain us.
WhatARetard says
you know what bitch, you’r just a pathetic little retarded troll who have no idea whatsoever how tough the life of professional wrestlers are and no idea whatsoever to the legendary status of the Nature Boy
Oh yeah..fuck you again.
WhatARetard says
Amen