And so Larry King lives to barely breathe another day – negotiations over the proposed daily hour-long Rosie O'Donnell prime-time MSNBC show have broken down, Rosie O'Donnell has revealed.
According to a post on her blog, Rosie O'Donnell's hopes of scoring a daily serious-minded TV show on MSNBC were over the moment she started yammering on about it to a crowd of people in Miami, and now MSNBC has pulled out of talks. While Rosie O'Donnell can cheerily put the failed MSNBC deal on the ever-growing pile of TV work she didn't manage to get, it still leaves MSNBC with a gaping hole at 9pm that it desperately needs to fill. Maybe producers were looking for a host who was a little less polarising than Rosie O'Donnell – like Joe Pasquale, maybe, or Dog The Bounty Hunter.
There are three places where Rosie O'Donnell feels most comfortable – 1) on an expensive fibreglass prehistoric movie set playing Rick Moranis' wife, 2) slumped in front of a webcam self-consciously dancing to Amy Winehouse records and 3) in front of a television camera spouting her beliefs at a bemused public. And while Rosie O'Donnell has done enough of the first one to last several lifetimes and keeps doing the second one, it's number three that's causing her problems at the moment.
For less than one glorious year recently, Rosie O'Donnell was the moderator on The View despite possibly being the least moderate woman on the face of the Earth. However, the high-profile spats with Donald Trump and the even higher-profile spats with shrieking, constantly-wrong co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck finished Rosie O'Donnell off, and since leaving The View she's had pretty much jack-all to do.
Not that the offers haven't been there, though – Donald Trump apparently extended the olive branch to Rosie O'Donnell by inviting her onto his new Celebrity Apprentice show, even though Rosie responded by taking the olive branch, snapping it in half and trying to stab it through Trump's balls. And then there was Rosie O'Donnell's quest to become the new host of The Price Is Right – a quest that failed presumably a third of a millisecond after the show's producers heard the words 'Rosie O'Donnell' and 'The Price Is Right' in the same sentence.
And then there's MSNBC. Earlier in the week the big news was that Rosie O'Donnell was in talks to be the host of a daily hour-long MSNBC show that'd put her directly up against Larry King. It would have been a dynamic show, that's for sure – at least until three weeks in where, after realising that there's only so much mileage one can get from slagging off the government and the Iraq war constantly, Rosie O'Donnell planned to either do a funny puppet show or fist-fight her own shadow for a full hour a night.
However, that's something we're never going to see because MSNBC has changed its mind about Rosie O'Donnell, as Rosie revealed on her blog yesterday:
we were close to a deal
almost done
i let it slip in miami
causing panic on the studio endwell
what can u do2day there is no deal
poof
my career as a pundit is over
b4 it began
Maybe Rosie O'Donnell will realise that not getting the MSNBC show is probably for the best. After all, she's proved time and time again that daytime is her stomping ground – possibly because it's easier to shout paranoid nonsense at an audience that self-medicates itself with coffee and perm lotion than at a news channel audience which is used to listening to and questioning a series of well-rounded opinions and ideas.
But Rosie O'Donnell shouldn't get downhearted by this MSNBC snub. After all, there's plenty more TV shows that'd welcome her with open arms, like You Bet Your Life (I'm About To Force My Opinions Down Your Throat), My Name Is ARRRRRGH or America's Got Lesbians!
A Lesbo Trapped In A Male Body says
In America anyone whose opinion is not in favor of the war or who references any of the dirt the Federal Government has done is immediately called hysterical.
So I guess the proper thing to do is clear your mind and watch the media for a newer, more correct one.