You can tell that Cristiano Ronaldo will be a good father to his three-week-old son. It’s perfectly obvious.
You can tell because he’s rich. You can tell because he has kindly eyes. You can tell because, um, he’s gone on holiday with a Russian model and left the baby with its nan. Alright, forget that last bit. The point is that fatherhood is bound to change Cristiano Ronaldo’s personality entirely. Now that he’s responsible for a young life, Cristiano Ronaldo is bound to become less self-obsessed, less egotistical, less…
What’s that? Cristiano Ronaldo has decided to name his son Cristiano Ronaldo? OK, forget everything we just said. The man’s a berk.
That Nike World Cup advert didn’t exactly work out very well, did it? It starred Wayne Rooney, who barely touched the ball. It starred Didier Drogba, who played with a broken arm. It starred Ronaldinho, who didn’t even make it into the Brazil squad. It starred Frank Ribery, who was part of an imploding team AND has been caught up in an underage prostitution scandal. And it starred Cristiano Ronaldo, whose tournament was similarly disappointing.
But at least now we know why Cristiano Ronaldo didn’t have his heart in the World Cup. It’s because, throughout all of his matches, he was busy thinking up a name for the son that nobody knew he’d just had. It had to be a good name – a name that was strong and masculine and bold and brave and, most importantly, unique.
So he called it Cristiano Ronaldo. Obviously. The Telegraph reports:
Ronaldo’s sister Katia said: “The baby is doing very well. We are looking after him while Cristiano is away. He’s called Cristiano just like his dad. Cristiano chose the name but we like it. He looks like his father and like me. He has the same eyes. We don't know the mother, we never met her… Some people may think it’s strange, but we don’t. We’re very happy about what Cristiano has done.”
But still, the important thing isn’t what the baby is called, it’s how happy he is. And we’re sure that baby Cristiano Ronaldo will be very happy with his father Cristiano Ronaldo, his new pet dog Cristiano Ronaldo, all of his toys which are all called Cristiano Ronaldo and every single dust particle he sees from now until the day he dies, each of which Cristiano Ronaldo has also decided to name Cristiano Ronaldo. Cristiano Ronaldo.
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Faith says
Hahahahha! This made me laugh :D
NoSurprise says
Did anyone actually think he was looking forward to fatherhood? Surrogate my a**! Of course he named the kid after himself! First off, he’s so narcissistic that he probably sends himself love letters. Furthermore, he’d have to actually give a damn about the impending birth of his first child to open up a baby name book, but this kid was undesired and an inconvenience and since he had to name the little mite SOMETHING, he named him after the only person he ever thinks about: Cristiano Ronaldo.
Hope says
Wow is it not okay to name your son after yourself? I always thought it was but guess I was wrong… Anyway I’m happy for him and I know he will be a great father and when he’s ready he will settle down and get married. Sure he needs to mature a little but that will take time. Any who I think it’s great he’s staying involved in the baby’s life, and everyone needs to stop being so critical of him.
stella says
It’s a waft of fresh air, until now it’s always been the father who was unknown.
Clever girl tricked unsuspecting Cristiano out of using a condom and then blackmailed him into paying her life maintenance and keeping the child. Well done! She’ll never have to make a living, in return nobody will know he sowed his wild oats in cheap brothels.
And Cristiano’s roost is happy.
Or maybe it’s the other way round. It’s a “lavender child” he paid a surrogate mother to bear in order to make believe he’s actually gay. Because there must be a good reason for holding back your child’s father/mother’s identity.
Leigh says
It’s actually a spanish tradition for a couples first born male to be named after his father. Many of my family members and Family friends have stuck to this tradition. I find no wrong in Cristiano naming his son after him. He will be a great father and I stupport him because we all know very little of the truth.
Margarida says
It is common in Portugal to name your first born son after the father. It is rather traditional but still very common. I’m from Madeira Portugal as well. It’s cultural and not because he of his ego.
Christiano Ronaldo says
What a ridiculous idea!
the man is a berk, you’re bang on there.
mary says
cristiano ronaldo is portuguese, not spanish. if you can’t tell the difference, maybe you shouldn’t post comments on the web