When the 16-year-old Ashton Kutcher started dating the 86-year-old Demi Moore everyone raised an eyebrow briefly, before realising that things like this happen all the time and there really was very little of interest about the pair.
Unless, of course, you imagined Bruce Willis going round every night to kick his arse like we did.
However, things are getting vaguely interesting now because there’s potential misery involved and, like most humans, there’s nothing we like more than seeing people who are richer and more talented than us suffer for absolutely no reason.
So what’s the grievance now? Well, allegedly Kutcher (we’re legally obliged to mention that he has a shed-load of twitter followers here) keeps playin’ where he shouldn’t be playin’… and he keeps thinkin’ that he’ll never get burnt.
Ha! These boots are made fer…
Sorry. Got a little carried away there.
Anyway, the rumours that are dogging him at the moment is that he’s cheating on his wife, Demi Moore, with Brittney Jones.
Who?
Don’t worry. She’s not famous really.
Star magazine first reported on this, which means we’re very happy to speculate about this whole sordid business whilst letting them pick up any legal tabs should Kutcher decide to start suing people. Basically, what we’re saying is that we’re absolutely clueless and writing a story based on complete hearsay and that STAR MAGAZINE DID IT! STAR MAGAZINE DID IT!
The mag’s senior executive editor Annabel Vered, says that there are more revelations to come. Not us. Star Magazine.
She said:
?Of course we have ways of authenticating the texts, we stand by our reporting 100 percent?when you see the texts you\’ll definitely believe that this went on.?
?There were more texts but Ashton made her delete them when they had their one night affair because he was very paranoid that he would be caught.?
?There's more to come? more on Demi and Ashton and the cheating scandal.?
Ashton?s attorney, who will no doubt be very angry with Star Magazine WHO DID ALL THIS, has yet to see the latest round of stories and had no comment until he speaks to his client.
Singer says:
?Star Magazine continuously publishes lies about Ashton Kutcher and many other celebrities. This is not the first, nor will it be the last time they engage in reckless conduct.?
No mention of hecklerspray there, which is worth pointing out.
So, if Ashton Kutcher has been sticking his penis into a woman that isn’t Demi Moore (which, lets be honest, isn’t out of the realms of possibility because, let’s face it, she looks terrifying doesn’t she? Ladies – feel free to say that He Ain’t All That Either and click your fingers in a Z shape or whatever it is you do when you’re being sassy), then we’re more than happy to gloat like cowards from afar.
If he’s not, then let it be on record that we think these rumours are simply awful and that STAR MAGAZINE STARTED IT! They probably pushed Kutcher’s bum down on someone when he was asleep and took pictures of it THE DIRTY BUGGERS.
:^) says
this whole kerfluffle may indeed be true, and if it is demi should not let ashton watch the tellytubbies for weeks!!! and take away his batman action figure!!!! that will teach him.