US Weekend Box Office - Fantastic Four Number One, Slump’s Over

There have been some huge films out this year. The conclusion of the Star Wars Trilogy, a reinvention of the Batman franchise and the most expensive film ever made. And none of these could stop Hollywood’s worst year-on-year cinema slump in living memory. And the film to end it? Fantastic Four.

That’s right. The film that stopped the cinema slump was a film about a man with stretchy arms and a sort of big dried-out turd. Fantastic Four is number one in the US weekend Box Office Chart.

Despite getting a terrible across-the-board critical mauling, Fantastic Four has topped the US Box Office, exceeding expectations by taking $56 million. War Of The Worlds,
now in second place, also helped end the 19-week slump by taking $31
million. All in all, box office takings are up 2.2% on last year.

Here’s this weekend’s US Box Office Chart…

1 - Fantastic Four (A big crusty poo-man throws lorries off a bridge) $56,000,000

2 - War Of The Worlds (A bunch of aliens come to Earth, chase Tom Cruise, get sore throats and die) $31,300,000

3 - Batman Begins (Batman hires a cheeky cockney butler and punches Oskar Schindler) $10,216,000

4 - Dark Water (A film about the scariest tap in all the world) $10,127,000

5 - Mr & Mrs Smith (The most hilarious wife-beating film ever) $7,850,000

6 - Herbie: Fully Loaded (A car overcomes a substance abuse problem) $6,274,000

7 - Bewitched (Remake of the sitcom, but with less obviously drunk actors) $5,500,000

8 - Madagascar (An anagram of Madagascar is Mad! A Gas Car!) $4,300,000

9 - Rebound (An angry coach leads children to sporting victory? What an original premise) $2,875,000

10 - Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (Someone taped over Cash In The Attic? Nooooooo!) $2,600,000

[story by Stuart Heritage]