This was meant to be another traditional Christmas for Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon, filled with everything they love.
Like, you know, tutting about healthcare. And whining about globalisation. And making festive dream-catchers out of taffeta and muesli for Ralph Nader. Or whatever. But, sadly, that isn’t to be – Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon have split up. They’ve been split up since the summer, in fact, but they’ve only decided to announce it now because they presumably hate Christmas.
But hey, let’s look on the bright side – now, instead of putting up with Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon endlessly preaching about their values around the world together, we’ll have the joy of putting up with Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon endlessly preaching about their values around the world independently of each other. That’s better, isn’t it?
Some things are just meant to go together, aren’t they? Like ham and pineapple, or horse and cart, or Christmas and uncomfortably impacted colons. And, until last night, we assumed that Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon also belonged in that group. They were perfect together – whether they were carping on heavy-handedly in public about how much they hate corporations and the war, or making heavy-handed films about how much they hate corporations and the war, Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon looked like they belonged.
But sod that, because they clearly weren’t. Yesterday it was announced that Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon had split up several months ago, after 23 years apart. Why wasn’t this news revealed earlier? We’re guessing it’s because nobody visits Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon’s house any more, out of fear that they’ll have their ears bent about the evils of the pharmaceuticals industry for hours at a time, but that’s just speculation at this point. Anyway, here’s People with details:
One of Hollywood’s most enduring relationships has ended ? Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins have broken up after more than two decades together. Actress Susan Sarandon and her partner of 23 years, actor Tim Robbins have announced that they separated over the summer,” her rep Teal Cannaday tells PEOPLE in a statement. “No further comments will be made.”
We’re honestly quite sad about this news. After all, the relationship that blossomed between Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon on the set of Bull Durham has long been the best thing about that movie. And now that they’ve split up we’ll have to find a new best thing about that movie. What if it’s Kevin Costner? What if Kevin Costner is the new best thing about Bull Durham? We don’t want to live in a world where Kevin Costner is the best thing about anything!
Damn you, Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon! Damn you for making Kevin Costner the best thing by default in a film that we’d forgotten about until about five minutes ago! We hate you!
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