Simon Cowell is pulling a sad face at the moment. Well, he’s trying to. The front bit of his head seems strangely immovable these days doesn’t it? It’s like a taut sausage, waiting to be popped with a fork. This is not a call to stab Cowell in the face should you see him.
Where were we? Oh yes, Simon is all sad. That’s because he’s had to watch his chum Cheryl Cole getting dumped by people more powerful than him, making the whole thing doubly wounding.
Since getting the chop from X Factor USA, Cheryl Cole has gone into hiding, ignoring everyone’s calls and texts (especially those sent by us, but then again, she’s been ignoring them since Girls Aloud liked each other), leaving Cowell to break the silence on the whole thing.
It appears that the person taking Cheryl’s place on the show is… uh… Simon Cowell, but he’s feeling really, really bad about it. Honest he is.
“I’m sorry it didn’t work out.”
…says Simon, now down to a mere three buttons fastened on his expensive, yet boring shirt.
A source says that Simon’s hands were pretty much tied about the whole Cheryl Cole thing.
“He loves Cheryl and did everything in his power to get her on US TV. But channel chiefs just weren’t happy. It was a necessary evil and he feels terribly guilty about it.
“He knew he’d get a slap in the face from her for all of this – and he certainly got one. But he doesn’t want any bad blood.”
Does anyone actually believe any of this guff? Cheryl getting the boot because of her accent? On a show that has Steve Jones presenting?
Really? REALLY?
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