President George Bush was reported to be "deeply alarmed" yesterday after pop star Pink announced that a song on her new album was to be a direct attack on the man himself.
"The President is seriously considering stepping down," confided a close White House aide. "It was bad enough when Green Day entered the political arena. Now that Pink is involved… well, this changes everything. Foreign policy, healthcare issues, the whole Iraq debate – it’s all coming under the spotlight. The most revelatory thing is that…"
…oh, forget it.
You know what? Sometimes being sarcastic just isn’t worth the effort. Let’s just stick to the facts instead. Anyone remember Pink?
Oh, you know Pink (CDs), she was big a couple of years back. Remember? She looked like a cross between Eddie Izzard and Eric Stoltz in Mask. Remember? She was responsible for ‘worst song in the history of mankind’ Get This Party Started (a little ditty which made the concept of a ‘party’ sound about as appealing as snorting fibreglass). Remember?
Sure you do. And hecklerspray just bets that you’ve been wondering what the Pinkster has been up to since, haven’t you? Well? Haven’t you? Well?
Here’s the answer, folks: she’s been getting all political. On Pink’s new album I’m Not Dead – Christ, if only that was a lie – Pink is all set to launch a ‘fierce’ attack on good old special-school-exile President Dubya. Warbling away to MTV News, Pink explained:
"I hope that the
President is proud of the song and proud of the fact that we live in a
country where we can do things like that, where we can fight for
democracy and have dissent and talk, communicate and share our opinions. I
also think that it’s pretty narcissistic to think that one of my songs
will be heard by the President of the United States, but, hey, that’d
be really cool."
See, everybody? There you were, getting all worried about the general state of America’s treatment of the world, the upcoming apocalypse-beckoning fuel crisis and all the socio-political ramifications thereof, weren’t you? Eh? Eh?
Well, don’t. Because Pink’s on board to sort everything out.
Phew.
Read More:
Pink attacks President Bush in new song – Breaking News
[story by C J Davies]