You could always rely on Paul McCartney for two
things; waggling his thumbs about like a dribbling goon, and the
unbearably condescending way he’d preach to everyone to be more like
him with his impenetrable hippy ideals.
But that’s all gone out the window. McCartney (CDs) has been signed up to star in adverts flogging Fidelity Investments, presumably to the handful of baby boomers that still hold him in any regard.
Last night, the first McCartney/Fidelity advert was shown in
America. Entitled This Is Paul, the commercial apparently took viewers
chronological tour of McCartney’s life and notable accomplishments."
We’re guessing that included him being the crappiest Beatle, him having
the stupidest solo career and – we’re praying – it lingers on the bad
mullet that sat on top of his head for twenty years in the eighties and
It’s been reported that Fidelity – which manages over
$1 trillion in funds – is aiming to tempt children of the sixties into
joining them by showing their hero getting progressively older and
older. The unsaid message is "Look at this old git. He’s OK – in fact,
he’s loaded – but you’ve pissed your life away, you stupid hippy. Face
it, you need us."
That’s not the official line, of course. A statement by Robert Reynolds, CEO of the financial firm, reads:
"Generations have grown up with Paul McCartney. People continue to be inspired by how he approaches
life with confidence, innovation and a long-term view. He’s the perfect
partner for Fidelity to help investors transition to the next chapter
in their lives."
And Paul’s getting in on the mutual love, too:
"I’m really pleased to be working with Fidelity. We have a lot in common: a
commitment to helping people, a dedication to the arts and a belief
that you should never stop doing what you love."
rewards for shamelessly going back on his ideals are twofold. Firstly,
Fidelity will underwrite his upcoming 11-week tour of America, and
secondly it’s a big fat stack of free publicity for his new album,
Chaos And Creation In The Backyard, released next week.
The album, just like all the albums he’s released in the last ten
years, is said to be his "best in years." We haven’t heard the album, but – seeing as it’s produced by Nigel Godrich – we’re expecting it to be covered in
all kinds of whooshy claptrap.
New album or not, Fidelity are thrilled to
have him onboard. Claire Huang, Fidelity’s executive vice president for
advertising, chose him because he’s "an
innovative market leader."
Yeah, a market leader of writing songs about frogs and being married to women with one leg…
[story by Stuart Heritage]