Morrissey. He’s an icon to limp wristed introverts who hole themselves up in their bedrooms with shelves full of kitchen sink dramas and books of dreadful self-written mewing poetry about being misunderstood and shit. They’re all very individual of course and don’t all flock to Salford Lad’s Club for yet another stupid photo.
Now, as lame as Mozza is, he’s always good value in interviews when he’s in Queen Bitch mode. Now he’s having a pop at Queen. No, not Freddie Mercury’s corpse or Brian May’s clogs. Rather, he doesn’t like Her Majesty the Queen’s liking of fur hats.
That’d be hats made from cute animals. Just in case you didn’t know where fur came from. Imagine Kissyfur. Now imagine wearing him as a nice snood. Appealing eh?
Anyway, Morrissey has urged the Queen to stop British Army Guards wearing real fur hats.
In a letter to The Times, the singer insisted that the responsibility of ensuring the guards do not wear real bearskin falls to the monarch.
He wrote:
“It is difficult not to look to the Queen herself – after all, they are her guards, and she must surely be aware of the horrific process utilised to supply real bearskins for her guards.
“The mere sight of each bearskin hat must surely jab at the Queen’s heart.”
Presuming she’s got one of course.
Morrissey added:
“Yes, animal rights move different people differently, and there are even those who think that animals simply have no right to be, but there is no sanity in making life difficult on purpose for the Canadian brown bear, especially for guards’ hats that look absurd in the first place, and which can easily be replaced by faux versions (thanks to the visionary Stella McCartney) with no death involved.”
Maybe the Queen will reply with… ‘Fair do’s. We’ll do a trade. You get The Smiths back together to appease those wet shits who follow your every word and I’ll stop my men wearing hats that look like Johnny Marr’s head in the ’80s.’
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