Hey you, quick, come out from behind the sofa. It's all over, honest. After nearly four months, the auto-tuned X Factor singers won't be making anymore feature length appearances on ITV to ruin your weekend.
As we all know, Little Mix were voted as the winners. Or, it was all fixed by Simon Cowell for them so we can have a girl group that are slightly more polished around the edges than when Girls Aloud first started out. Learn from your mistakes and whatnot.
So how exactly do you celebrate winning a national competition which has been steadily declining in viewers each week? Sip on champagne whilst hanging out with record execs? Little Mix had Tulisa as a mentor. She took them for a kebab instead.
For the scum of society like us, a kebab is nothing more than delicious thin strips of oily brown meat, presented in a polystyrene box. The grub itself is nothing more but lamb baws and horse gristle smashed together to make something described as a food stuff you can shove down your throat ’til you wretch.
But Little Mix and Tulisa aren't like us common folk who?ll coat their post pub treat in gallons of garlic sauce before dropping it all over themselves.
They?ll be dining in places where kebabs are from fresh cuts of wild boar, unicorn and bear.
Taking to Twitter after they?d all munched a rough piece of meat that had been stewing in its own juices for weeks, Tulisa said:
?What do ya do after ur act wins the xfactor??
You should bloody know as we already written a few hundred words about it, but anways:
?…go 2 ur local kebab shop of course, wooooiiiiiii….?
We’re looking at you Jesy Mix. You greedy little Muffin you.