Let us begin with a little anecdote. Someone close to hecklerspray used to go out with a chap in the armed forces many moons ago. They met a fella in the barracks who was shyly strumming away at his guitar. So shy was he, that she felt compelled to say “Hey! Don’t be shy!” and encouraged him to play further.
That man was, and still is, James Blunt. Of course, various hecklerspray writers have since beaten this girl to death while screaming ‘You’re Beautiful’ at her because, essentially, his whole career is her fault.
So when James Blunt isn’t being crass rhyming slang, stopping World War III (if you believe reports) and being irritatingly charming on chatshows, what’s he up to? Well, it mainly involves getting off with women and, on this occasion, someone from the Pussycat Dolls.
Get ready to do one of those unpleasant little vurps.
James Blunt has been seen kissing Pussycat Dolls member Jessica Sutta, which of course, means that the gruesome duosome are probably dating, which means that, on a regular basis, James Blunt is getting erections and popping them inside someone who sings “Dontcha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?” while he does it.
Of course, if she is his girlfriend, then the question being asked is utter nonsense.
Anyway, Blunt was spotted getting flirty with Jess in a Los Angeles nightclub after his show in West Hollywood or something. This is double horror. Firstly, you have to imagine what one of James Blunt’s shows is like and secondly, you have to picture him flirting with someone. Imagine his posh, adenoidal voice whispering grimly sexy stuff in your ear.
We reckon his breath smells like socks.
One eyewitness revealed to The Sun:
“They met up straight after James’ gig and hit it off like a house on fire. James instantly hit the bar and was buying Jessica drinks and was clearly smitten.
“By the end of the evening and a few drinks later, they were snogging each other’s faces off and very touchy feely before leaving together.”
The last time these two were romantically linked (back in 2005), Jessica From The Pussycat Dolls was on record as saying:
“There’s no way I’d date him.”
She’s clearly become more stupid in the past 5 years. Or desperate for someone with a shedful of a money.