These days, a day in the life of Charlie Sheen consists of turning up to jury service, spending all day placing bets on major league baseball, then getting unceremoniously kicked out by 3pm. Celebrities – they’re just like us!
Charlie turned up to his home away from home – an LA courthouse – on Tuesday to do his part for the community as a prospective juror. It must have been nice for him to walk into court knowing that for once, it can’t end in a forced rehab stay and eighteen months probation.
He was also sporting a tattoo that’s probably something to do with baseball judging by the conversation he was having with the TMZ reporter. Do these guys have actual homes or are they made to permanently camp outside prominent L.A buildings just in case someone famous shows up? I feel like we should throw a benefit for them, you guys.
After telling reporters that he was really hoping for a “multiple homicide” case, he went on to explain that if anything, his multiple coke overdoses make him more qualified to be a juror for a drug trial than your average Joe Clean-Nose.
It seems he was in the minority there, because he never actually made it in to the courtroom. Which is a shame, because the expression on the defendant’s face when he finds out that Charlie Sheen has a hand in his fate would make for one memorable courtroom sketch.
Instead, it seems he spent the entire day in the Jury Assembly Room taking pictures with fans, betting on the World Series and tweeting his thoughts on civic duty:
I took one look at the guy, and knew immediately: mistrial. http://t.co/MMGD3IdVzw
— Charlie Sheen (@charliesheen) September 24, 2013
He also told reporters that he spent most of the day napping. You’d think that if anybody was going to recreate 12 Angry Men,
it would be the guy who was actually sentenced to anger management therapy, but there you go.
He was dismissed around 3pm, being told that just turning up was good enough. The LA justice system must be trying to vamp up it’s image, because Tom Hanks was summoned and then excused from jury duty a few weeks ago after one of the prosecutors talked to him outside the court.
I believe we can expect celebrity-endorsed trials any day now – “Coming Soon To A Kourt House Near You – The Kardashian Kriminal Negligence Kase.”