Because fashion dictates more and more of our lives, it wouldn't be surprising to see a baby come out its mother?s womb wearing a designer top.
Everywhere we go, it seems that unless we wear a patchwork coat made out of plastic bags, we're not trendy and people that others want to be seen with.
However, items like a one-off pair of unicorn boots can often cost up to ?1.000 and the common people reading this won't be able to afford such luxury items. What we need is something less pricey that’s fun, fresh, funky and – most importantly – clothing you'd want people to see you in. Budget tack outlets Primark and H&M have already claimed this market with scores of young girls clawing chunks of skin out of rivals for ?2 acid green leggings. If you've ever fancied the pikey look instead of a happy floral print dress, then ladies it looks Kerry Katona?s new line of clothing could be for you.
Kerry Katona isn't just a phoenix who rose from the ashes. She is like some sort of robot super creature who constantly comes back to annoy us. Kind of like a cockroach that just won't die, even though a full can of bug spray and your sister’s shoe were used to end its slimy miserable life. Despite being at the end of career revamp number three, she has somehow managed to cling onto the fame ladder.
Because the news can often be slow, some papers often like to report on famous people doing naughty things. Who cares about civil war and gallons of oil making the characters in The Little Mermaid poorly, WE NEED GOSSIP ON FAMOUS PEOPLE! So a hidden camera was set up in Kerry Katona?s bathroom where she snorted some cocaine.
Her other problem was all-round layabout and pointless husband Mark Croft. What he did is still a mystery, but when we watched their car crash reality TV show on MTV it seemed he constantly complained about not having takeaway food on tap and not having the latest flashy gadget that allowed him to make mini sculptures out of his bogeys.
So what's the best way to make yourself loved by the world again despite being caught doing drugs and having a lout of a husband? Simply announcing yourself as being a bit of tit and getting a divorce. Christ, if we?d known it was that easy, we?d have started snorting strange-looking powders and marrying trollops from the Jeremy Kyle Show ages ago. And what's next for Kerry? It seems that some strange marketing people think people will want to dress like her. The Daily Mail reports:
?Kerry’s determined to launch clothing that makes real women feel better about themselves. She also harbours plans to create lingerie that is comfortable to wear and sexy swimwear for mothers whose bodies have been affected by having children?.
As of yet, prices have not been revealed for any of the proposed range – but for ten pieces of lucky heather, we've been told you can get yourself a dress that has been consists of one hundred takeaway menus stapled together. It's known as the ?all you can eat? creation.
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